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Home > Kindergarten Cop Soundboard
Warning: This soundboard may contain objectionable content, and is Not Safe For Work (NSFW)
A lot of flu going around this time of year isn't that so
A male kindergarten teacher isn't what i'm used to
A male kindergarten teacher that's unusual
A table for two thank you very much
A thermometer
Aah! help! help! help! somebody! help!
Actually it's quite a large serving
After the divorce he said we could stay here in exchange for keeping the place up
Ah good
All I have to do is tell my parents that you're here with something to do with the police and they'll yank their kids out of this school so fast we'd have to close the place
All right
All right (2)
All right (3)
All right all right settle down
All right did you tell anyone else this
All right let's get back into school
All right let's go back to class
All right let's try it again
All right move it in let's go step onto the numbers face front
All right party's over everyone go home
All right take your milk it makes you big and strong
All that hard earned drug money she stole from you
All the other grades your times were an improvement but they're still not good enough
All you have to do is point your finger and we can put him away for 30 years
And a little something I cooked myself for you
And blow our cover can't do it
And dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal and that government of the people by the people and for the people shall not perish from this earth
And don't you think I won't if I feel my children are in any danger
And even better salazar told me I have to tell you this
And flowers as well here you go she'll love them
And frankie my swimming teacher and gus my t ball coach are better than you too
And he his head is so big that he can't wear any hats
And he made me my favorite pasta a olio
And i'm sorry that I didn't believe you
And i've just been worried about sylvester he's been acting a little strange lately you know doing odd things
And on that farm he had a duck e I e I o
And then I coached basketball at an all girls school in rhode island but none of it made me really happy
And there goes our goddamn case
And this is dominic
And who's that
And writes I taught him myself
Anyway um I have a small problem
Are these all your lunches you mean you eat other people's lunches stop it!
Are these all your lunches? #fat kid #gorge #glutton #lunch thief #kindergarten cop #arnold
Are you a single parent mr green
Are you all right come on let's go
Are you listening
Are you married mr kimble
Are you okay
Are you serious you really know where he is
Are you sure
Aren't you going to break it up
Arnold Screaming and Leaving #screaming #im outta here #leaving #arnold #kindergarten cop
As a matter of fact he had two mothers unfortunately the first one died
At the school where I saw them astoria elementary school
Attention!
Austria
Bad people
Bailiff remove the prisoner
Bastard
Be good i'll be back to pick you up
Be right out!
Big circles big circles good now do the same thing way back and down in big circles big circles
Bon voyage
Boys have a penis girls have a vagina
Boys have a penis girls have a vagina (2)
Breakfast sir ma'am
Bring it back to the carpet quick quick quick back to the carpet quickly
Bullshit
But i'll keep an eye on him okay
But i'm sure there won't be any more occurrences
But it worked
But it's kinda tough on sylvester don't you think
But she I know
But we don't want joyce to think that do we
But what about your wife you remember her
But what you can't do what you must never ever do is never talk to strangers
But you shouldn't punch people
Can I help you
Can I pet him
Can we talk to dogs
Can you start a fire I don't think it should be a problem
Can't trust you I can't trust anybody
Check it out right
Cheerleader first violin in the school orchestra captain of the girls' softball team
Children's aspirin children's decongestant antihistamine
Cindy I don't like you using foul language not a classy girl like you
Cindy o d 'd last night
Class excuse me
Come in
Come on
Come on (2)
Come on (3)
Come on all together!
Come on come on come on
Come on come on everyone together! come on
Come on come on get all together everything together come on
Come on come on out
Come on come on! right here
Come on john i'm hungry
Come on one two three four come on go go
Come on quiet quiet! come on shh! quiet
Come on sit down
Come on stop whining
Come on zach let's all play together it's so much more fun
Come to me I want to start
Company halt!
Congratulations dominic the king of mount kimble!
Congratulations happy birthday
Courage that's my philosophy too
Crisp you're under arrest put your hands on your head and get up!
Cullen jr aged 3 months
Cullen told everybody I stole his money that way all these creeps would be looking for us to collect a big reward
Daddy
Daddy (2)
Danny danny! no! danny!
Danny where are they
Danny! get up! don't you die on me!
Daryl daryl
Das macht mich stocksauer jetzt bin ich sauer
Did he ever say what name she was using in oregon
Did he say anything before he left
Did I do that
Did I i'm sorry
Did lincoln have four mothers
Did she die no she went to see someone
Did she see you
Did they die
Did you see cullen jr
Did your daddy teach you this game
Didn't join the union until
Difficult man got to get to know him
Dinner won't be ready for a few minutes
Do you mean to tell me that you wouldn't take a bottle wine to a woman who's invited you over for dinner of course you would you know you would
Do you need a hand
Do you want to see something else
Does sylvester ever see his father
Doesn't anybody eat around here
Doesn't hurt to take precautions
Dominic
Dominic come back we're getting out of here dominic
Dominic doesn't even remember him
Dominic don't forget ferret
Dominic has been such a great help he's a good kid
Dominic stay close to me okay come on stay close to me
Dominic wait!
Dominic!
Dominic! (2)
Dominic! dominic!
Dominic! where's dominic dominic!
Don't don't
Don't go anywhere
Don't touch him!
Don't worry
Don't worry about anything okay we're going to be right across the hall
Don't worry about it we'll be fine
Don't worry i'm going to make it I just need a minute i'll be ready in just a minute I just got
Don't you have anything better to do
Don't you know the building is on fire
Don't you recognize me no sure you do it's me
Don't you remember
Don't you remember twinkle twinkle little star
Donde vas
Down to the wood where the bluebells grow anywhere anywhere I don't know
Drop it on the floor
Drop it! i'm losing it! hurry!
Drop the gun! drop the gun!
E is the fifth letter of the alphabet
Emma take your toy to the carpet
Everybody hands to your side
Everybody sit down on the carpet!
Everyone dies you know
Everything's going to be fine we just want to be extra careful
Everything's going to be okay dominic
Excuse me
Excuse me everybody
Excuse me i'm john kimble i'm zach's teacher
Excuse me this is your lucky day I have a better idea
Excuse me! surprise!
Faster faster come on yes come back terrific this is working wait
First day yes
First I would like to just get to know you
Follow me silly
Four scores and seven years ago
Four scores and seven years ago (2)
Four weeks into the new semester my superintendent told me I had to replace mrs hagley a kindergarten teacher of 25 years' experience with an undercover police officer and he wouldn't even tell me why
Fourscore and seven years ago our forefathers brought forth on this continent a new nation conceived in liberty
Freeze!
Freeze! (2)
Freeze! (3)
Get dominic okay dominic! dominic!
Get it
Get some rest and don't worry
Get those tree stumps out of my way before I vomit all over them
Give me the flowers
Go away
Go come on come right back to the carpet
Go go for it yes very fast
Go quickly get your toy
Go to hell
Go!
Going to start a whole new family
Good
Good good that's smart
Good morning
Good morning (2)
Good morning (3)
Good morning everyone
Good morning miss schlowski
Good morning mr kimble
Good morning mr kimble (2)
Good morning mr kimble (3)
Good morning phoebe
Good news you two are booked on the first flight to portland tomorrow morning
Good okay next one come on
Good quickly bring the toy back to the carpet
Good ready
Good then bring it back to the carpet pronto
Good very good
Gotcha!
Great
Great (2)
Great day huh
Great dominic you're doing well
Great well here are the directions
Hanna could you wrap that for me please
Have them tell the wife we're letting crisp go and he knows where she is
Have you guys had fun yeah
He came all the way up here just to surprise me
He came to us as a substitute teacher and he's proven to be a wonderful asset
He didn't say anything
He doesn't know where we are now and i'd like to keep it that way
He doesn't like anyone to talk to him
He doesn't live in france
He doesn't want me he wants dominic
He found out where we were and tried to kidnap dominic
He killed your boyfriend
He lives with his mother
He lives with his mother and stepfather