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Home > Ricky Gervais Soundboard
NSFW Audio: Use caution, some sounds may be offensive
Accept your little award #award #thank your agent #golden globes #opening monologue
Baked beans or vegetable curry pt1
Baked beans or vegetable curry pt2
Come here girl pt1
Come here girl pt2
Come here girl pt3
Don't use it as a political platform #golden globes #celebs #no politics #lecture the public #out of touch
Everyone sweet when they're little although I mean hitler was probably cute when he was that age
He's nearly handsome
Humanity is a plaque pt1
Humanity is a plaque pt2
Humanity is a plaque pt3
I actually gave me a list of rules i'm going to ignore them but I thought it would be good to read them out OK
I just threatened a 10 year old with a hammer pt1
I just threatened a 10 year old with a hammer pt2
I want to try heroin tonight pt1
I want to try heroin tonight pt2
I want to try heroin tonight pt3
I was about eleven PM a complex and I said mom why my brother and sister so much older than maine and she said because you were a mistake
I'm more than sick alan i've got one of the worst diseases on the planet what is that man flu
I'm off are going to see some of the rest of europe alright you have a nice time while you talking raping hat
I'm tony
I've seen it is northern comic he came out and he just said what we're going to do all these fucking immigrants and he got a round of applause and I just thought that's not a joke
It's going to be a night of partying and heavy drinking how is charlie sheen calls it breakfast
Just 'cause you're offended it doesn't mean you're right I don't care
Liam Aids
Mister spock is half vulcan half human OK
My answer that for about twenty years she used to say I won't see christmas right she was right eventually
Oh look it's a ginger frankenstein
Oh no it's a joke yeah
OK so good having a job where you can get drunk and say what you want it's like can they still pay you
Postman pat
Pretty name three things you can cover with chocolate cake yourself someone else
Relax i'm going to try and be nice
Remember, they're just jokes #golden globes #joking #comedy #not serious #lighten up #were all gonna die
Shut up I don't care
Shut up you gusting pill popping sexual deviant scum
They want to fight me
What's your name
Would you come to the hospital and tell a dying child there was no heaven and I just sent back is this a paid gig
Yeah #yep #ya #yeah #lol #laugh #funny #yes #ok #okay #ricky gervais
You did it #your fault #not me #pointing fingers #golden globes
You know nothing about the real world #golden globes #real world #reality #ignorant #out of touch
You're Absolutely Mental #crazy #insane #mad #demented #psychotic #ludicrous #silly #mental #psycho #nuts #batty #cuckoo
You're the w*nker mate
Your real name