Sex and the City - Season 1 Edit

A beach house in East Hampton...

A Bulgari necklace, a breast job.

A certain man...

A citizen of the world, darling.

A closet full of clothes, nothing to wear.

A complementary order of mee krob.

A complete lie. She remembered. We all remembered.

A couple of blocks and way too much money later...

A couple of hours later, I was looking forward...

A couple of hours later, Samantha woke up still drunk and still single.

A couple of weeks later, we were all there...

A couple so obviously into each other there was only one thing to do...

A crosstown bus or a downtown bus?

A fairly successful sports agent who once told her she had nice legs.

A few days ago, Neville Morgan, the notoriously reclusive painter...

A few hours and a couple of bottles of Pinot Grigio later...

A gift for Shayla...

A group of my friends tomorrow afternoon to watch it go by.

A Herb Ritt's photo.

A law firm softball game is like any other...

A lawyer named Chip. Gotta love that.

A little kiss to make me feel better.

A Man and a Slightly Neurotic Woman.

A man who cares about mother makes a wonderful husband.

A mistake I made when I was 26...

A motorcycle, a juicer.

A preview of a life I didn't know if I was ready for.

A preview.

A pseudo lesbian couple attended a right wing Republican dinner party.

A public relations executive...

A rabbit intervention.

A relationship has to be based on honesty and communication to succeed.

A rich husband, followed by a richer divorce.

A self centered, withholding creep...

A short cab ride later...

A short time later, Samantha headed back to her office...

A time for spying.

A town house in the city...

A very handsome, witty young man about to come into his inheritance.

A vibe like you've got a fire inside of you.

A vibrator does not call you on your birthday, send flowers the next day...

A wedding this size always has two singles tables.

A while.

A woman's touch on me.

A young woman fell in love.

About 12 think they're having enough sex.

About 12 times...

About being sexually rejected by your friends.

About half the time I'm at my apartment, and the other half...

About not sleeping with men right away actually paid off.

About shopping as a way to unleash the creative subconscious.

About time you invited me up.

About two months.

Abso fuckin' lutely.

Abso fucking lutely.

Absolutely. How about tonight?

Absolutely. Listen, I've gotta go. I'm running late.

Across town, Miranda was dealing with her own nightmare.

Actually his name is Stanford. Stanford Blatch.

Actually, he's sleeping with all of them in general.

Actually, I meant more like screwing in an airplane bathroom...

Actually, I'm an atheist, but don't tell the minister.

Actually, it's Carrie.

Actually, they'd shed a new light on his shower free feelings about sex.

Actually, you missed a lot.

Actually...

After 12 phone calls and three e mails...

After a movie, we're walking down Second Avenue and just passed...

After a night of spiritual reading with her hunky guru...

After a while, it's kind of like a taffy pull.

After a while...

After all these years, I finally saw him for what he was:

After all, Mr. Big was with me now.

After all, our lives are built on threesomes.

After all, she'd come this far.

After all, what did I really know about Mr. Big?

After he left, I cried for a week.

After Miranda left, I had a thought.

After sleeping together for many weeks...

After the second show, each of us went on with our Saturdays.

After they closed the jazz joint they walked and talked for blocks.

Again!

Alienation of affection followed by divorce.

Alive or dead?

All for a blow job?

All I can say is that my big payoff better be worth it.

All I could think was why aren't we having sex?

All I hear is...

All I know is that she's not the right woman for me in the larger sense...

All I'm saying is that this is a physical expression...

All my conversations consisted of two sentences...

All of a sudden they can't perform the way they're supposed to.

All right, look. Now we're gonna have a party.

All right.

All right.

All right. Bye.

All right. Fine. Have a good time, and promise to tell me everything.

All right. Go, go, go, go.

All right. I'm gonna take them.

All right. Let's get it over with.

All right. Ready?

All right. See ya there.

All right. Well, ladies, I'm just going to dinner.

All right. You're right. I'll go get dressed.

All righty. My turn.

All she had to do was keep believing, and it would happen.

All she wanted to talk about was her Diaper Genie.

All talk and no action, huh? What a cafone!

All that bullshit you spout...

All the same, all designed to fuck up our sex lives.

Allanne.

Allen, Justine and Peter.

Allison, I think you're great...

Allison, this is Miranda and Carrie. Miranda and Carrie, this is Allison.

Aloha.

Already you can't talk to them, you don't need them to have kids with...

Also known as Ed, Samantha's accountant.

Also, he wanted to show off his new boyfriend...

Also, I just left my cab fare on the table.

Although I'm beginning to know more.

Although Pamela had the hottest contacts in town...

Am I the only one who thinks this is a major bummer?

Amazingly, talking dirty about not having sex...

An ex wife. That's a new twist.

An hour and a half into this housewarming...

An up and coming New York playwright.

And 29...

And 31.

And a few days apart felt like weeks.

And a gynecological condition no one had ever heard of.

And a slightly less certain woman...

And affairs we try to forget as quickly as possible.

And all that waiting...

And another thing. I'm not buying any of that women having sex like men crap.

And as for Gilles and the $1,000...

And at the risk of sounding like a groupie...

And attempted to stun it senseless with cosmopolitans.

And beauty.

And began to reevaluate her options.

And by then, at least you're emotionally involved.

And Capote Duncan found his fix for the night.

And Charlotte...

And confessed a shocking intimate secret.

And decide he was an asshole...

And don't talk with your mouth full,...

And eggshell!

And emotionally compartmentalize our lives?

And everything's done in the house, and I've been doing it all day...

And feeling superior to me.

And glamorous resorts.

And golden showers.

And had just closed escrow on a house in the Hamptons.

And have a good time.

And he absolutely adored Charlotte.

And he found it... Charlotte.

And he just put his arms around me.

And he thinks of me as one of the boys.

And he told me he'd like to get a piece of it for his apartment...

And he's doing everything and it feels good...

And here I thought that all you really wanted was a good spanking.

And I completely forgot about him after that.

And I didn't have his phone number.

And I don't know what I want.

And I don't objectify women.

And I finished first in my litigation class.

And I had these big hands, like big aluminum hands.

And I have terrific sources: My friends.

And I have the key to the private room downstairs.

And I helped him pick out a top of the line cheese grater at Williams Sonoma.

And I just can't handle this right now.

And I know that I shouldn't be because I can sense...

And I left wondering if everyone in Manhattan was settling.

And I lived in this, like, big missile silo...

And I never want this mentioned again.

And I owe it all to Charlotte.

And I realized the real appeal of the threesome: It was easy.

And I said, "You should get the bulge in your pants.

And I saw you.

And I totally respect it...

And I used to hang out with this guy who was really beautiful...

And I wanted the feel of...

And I was beginning to worry.

And I will not be made to feel inadequate by all this baby talk.

And I would crush them to pieces with my big aluminum hands.

And I'm gonna have to move to another city...

And I'm helpless.

And I'm hoping that you're around when I get them.

And I'm terrified that's he's gonna leave me because I'm not perfect.

And I've never found before in one woman...

And if being sexually adventuresome...

And if God made the body and sex is an expression of that body...

And if he never calls me again, I'll always think of him fondly...

And if I do, then I'll be the "up the butt" girl.

And if I was really having sex like a man, why didn't I feel more in control?

And infiltrate the enemy camp.

And insisted she spend the night on her couch.

And it is hot.

And it isn't just straight people.

And it makes me wanna puke.

And it still fits.

And it usually got her what she wanted.

And it was the best sex I've ever had in my life.

And it was the best sex I've ever had in my life.

And it's been two days.

And just as suddenly, our little cease fire was over.

And just had a good time.

And just plain professional?

And just when I thought I couldn't get any higher...

And just when I thought I couldn't sink any lower...

And Laney away from the vodka.

And let's not forget "International Melissa."

And listen to Peter Frampton.

And look for pictures of old girlfriends.

And maybe a little cottage in Maine.

And maybe even pick up a few extra bucks...

And Miranda couldn't believe what she was about to say.

And Miranda is having a meaningful relationship with something from a box.

And move with me to Paris immediately.

And moved to Connecticut.

And my hands from dialing his number.

And my parents thought I was helping him with his chemistry homework.

And never having one of those "Oh, my God, what have I done?" epiphanies.

And New York magazine just named him one of the 30 coolest people...

And next you're gonna say that God made the body...

And no great unmarried men?

And none of you says yes. What the fuck?

And not have sex?

And not quite grown into the men of my future.

And not that interested in sex...

And now I'm on a Fifth Avenue bus with a penis on my head.

And now we can have sex without commitment.

And of these more than 3 million people...

And one by one, they'd run at me! They got inside somehow.

And one of our passengers had jumped ship.

And one time, I came for like five minutes.

And others I think just need the validation.

And out.

And P.S., it's fabulous.

And people who can't get it.

And people would find you amusing.

And play by the rules.

And pleasure...

And probably others just have a thing for exceptionally beautiful women.

And sacrifice themselves to the same cause... babies

And Samantha flaunted her infidelity...

And Samantha found the ultimate validation:

And Samantha was putting the moves on Mr. Big.

And scheduled an appointment to meet him at his studio.

And shared their most intimate secrets.

And she never saw him at the gym again.

And she's definitely kind of somebody...

And single to Samantha meant one thing.

And single. How is this possible?

And so another Friday night in Manhattan crept towards dawn.

And so are we.

And so do you.

And sometimes, like now, they get you so high.

And speaking of potential boyfriends...

And suddenly, there he was wearing Armani on Sunday.

And that it was time to call it a night.

And that way you can keep track of them.

And that's about it.

And that's all, folks.

And that's exactly what's missing in Manhattan...

And the gallery...

And the most fabulous validation I've ever gotten in my life.

And the next minute I'm depressed for no reason.

And the whole chat bit, and I'm like, "Let's not even go there."

And then afterwards they feel nothing.

And then he brought you.

And then he invited me here to dinner.

And then he kissed me.

And then I realized I do have faith.

And then Samantha did something rather shocking for a first date...

And then the most powerful woman in Manhattan asked me for a favor.

And then used the opportunity to ransack Ted's apartment...

And then we had lunch a few weeks ago...

And then, after another chance meeting...

And then, she'd say something else. But the bigger question remained.

And there she went...

And there's something wrong with that?

And these brats come along and start eating it.

And they all look at you like you're a...

And they had wild sex. Threesomes. We don't have wild sex.

And they looked like they fell out of a J. Crew catalog.

And they say I am just as beautiful as a model, but I work for a living.

And they seemed so relieved to have finally figured me out.

And they sit you at the kid's table.

And they will be married 41 years next month.

And they're afraid we're gonna have it anytime, anywhere with their husbands.

And they're alone.

And this afternoon I had courtside tickets to the Knicks...

And this cappuccino just kicked in, so...

And this is his very cute friend Sam.

And this is the den.

And true identities.,,

And us.

And vows of friendship renewed, we were almost out the door when...

And was about to move into an apartment he had just purchased.

And we are all going there next week for the film festival.

And we don't have a lot in common.

And we really need to eat now.

And we were there to celebrate the moment.

And we're happy just to have some guy who can throw around a frisbee.

And what is that? The gospel according to Miranda?

And what will the rest of you be having?

And what? Single women prowl beach houses...

And when do I get to go to church with you two?

And when I come out, you won't be here.

And when I started looking, they were everywhere.

And where I am now is so much better than sex.

And while Charlotte embraced fidelity...

And with that one touch, Samantha...

And with the right guy...

And wondered how much longer she could fight the war...

And yet you can have good sex with someone you don't like or respect...

And you cannot take a vibrator home to meet your mother.

And you didn't even know it?

And you're never really sure you've got the right answer.

And you're the first one to see it.

And you're very, very sexy.

And, actually, you can't stay over.

And?

And...

And...

Another 30 something birthday with a group of unmarried female friends.

Another girlfriend.

Another Saturday night.

Another single woman was about to be humiliated.

Another time I hate being single is when married friends "surprise" fix you up.

Any couple.

Anytime, anywhere with anyone.

Anytime.

Anyway, he wasn't a rabbi.

Anywhere you want.

Apparently someone else's fire was a little stronger than Charlotte's.

Arabia, New Jersey.

Architect, philanthropist and the sex was amazing.

Are a way to block our spiritual hunger...

Are men in their twenties the new designer drug?

Are relationships the religion of the '90s?

Are so unfair, it makes me puke.

Are we dating? I thought we were just sleeping together.

Are we gonna stick around and catch the bouquet?

Are we there yet?

Are what I consider to be the apotheosis...

Are you a musician?

Are you doing anything tonight?

Are you here all by yourself?

Are you number nine?

Are you okay?

Are you on a date?

Are you out of your mind? What the hell do you think you're doing?

Are you saying that I'm not pretty enough?

Are you serious?

Are you serious? I studied you in college.

Are you sure you're not gay?

Are you sure?

Are you telling me you haven't gotten those "poor single you" looks?

Are you telling us you never perform this act?

Are you testing me? Why all the interest in meeting my mother?

Are you... Oh, God.

Aren't you cocky!

Aren't you the young lady who made all that noise?

As an asshole.

As Charlotte pondered how far she would go for her love of art...

As did we all.

As he walked out the door, it suddenly dawned on me...

As I began to get dressed, I realized that I'd done it.

As I confronted that eternal puzzle...

As I glanced around the room, I was amazed...

As I helped him try them on, I thought...

As I hung up, I realized I'd committed the cardinal sin...

As I looked around at all the memorabilia and family photographs...

As I moved through the married couples, I noticed something was different.

As I penciled in the date, I noticed something missing.

As I searched for my morning Marlboro Light...

As I sifted through the rubble of my marriage skirmish...

As I struggled with the dilemma of how to manage my newfound money...

As I surveyed the room...

As I turned the midsize coupe onto Hollyhock Lane...

As I walked away, I had a thought: Maybe all men are a drug.

As I watched Laney tear open a baby bib...

As I watched Mr. Big standing quietly next to his mother...

As I watched people leaving church, I was amazed at how they looked.

As I've just very pleasantly discovered.

As if we didn't have enough problems.

As more boring than exposed brick?

As Moses parting the Red Sea.

As Samantha began to get ready for her close up...

As Samantha went cold turkey...

As Samantha went on about her sexual escapades...

As she sipped her beer...

As Skipper rededicated his singular affection for Miranda...

As the only single lawyer working at her law firm...

As they rode between floors...

As this beautiful unicorn woman with glass eyes.

As we took a swig from our pony necked beers...

As well as the subject of his single minded obsession.

At a gallery opening.

At a nearby health food restaurant.

At a wealthy lawyer's new son's Bris...

At Bed, Bath & Beyond.

At least I can't.

At parties.

At the club, in front of the club, on the corner of the club.

At the wide variety of great twenty something guys.

Attend a fabulous party.

Baby.

Back at Chaos...

Back when they were terminally uncool.

Barkley, a notorious modelizer...

Barkley.

Beats me. If I'd known he was Catholic...

Beautiful and boring or homely and interesting, is that it?

Beauty is fleeting...

Beauty.

Because even if you're the only person in the bed...

Because I don't have the patience to clean up this mess for the fourth time.

Because I have an amazing date.

Because the number of dates you wait to have sex with a man...

Because they were too short or too fat or too poor.

Because we want to know each other for another ten years.

Beers and bar nuts at Flanagan's off Route Five...

Before anybody's feelings get hurt?

Before I married my husband, I slept around with everybody.

Before I say something, I say it in my head first so it doesn't come out wrong.

Before I was able to completely indulge my paranoia...

Before I was on my way back to New York.

Before you put in the onions, know what I mean?

Being beautiful is such a power. You can get whatever you want.

Bernie Turtletaub from the wedding.

Beside, I think I've given myself carpal tunnel.

Besides the $1,000 on the end table?

Besides the validation and acclaim.

Besides, it's on Carlo.

Besides, there's no such thing as bad publicity.

Better... because this time...

Big pepper mill dick!

Big was happily dating another woman...

Bing Crosby.

Bing Crosby.

Bitch is getting everything the first bitch didn't.

Boom! Suddenly you're kissing another woman while he beats off.

Bosc! They've got to be bosc.

Both incredibly insecure.

Both wild, both sexy...

Brains, taste, class...

Brave Miranda marched right over and told Syd she wasn't.

Brigid, Roxanne, these are my friends from the city.

Brigid, Roxanne, these are my friends from the city.

Brokers give investment advice. Architects, design advice.

Builds. Rises.

Busboys, bouncers.

But a rent controlled apartment overlooking the park is forever.

But are you sure that isn't just 'cause he didn't call you?

But as I got older I realized...

But as soon as you only want them for sex, they don't like it.

But at least I'd get five minutes face to face with her.

But at some point, you have to settle down.

But Charlotte suddenly did feel a little warm.

But do not worry. For $100 dollars, we can remove it.

But eventually I'd love to have my own shop.

But every now and then, I can't help but think about...

But from that moment on, we never had a problem...

But he had left me a note...

But he's sweet, and he respects my boundaries

But I can't control it. I can't.

But I can't date somebody that won't. What's the point?

But I couldn't help but wonder: What do they see in us?

But I crushed him.

But I felt I had in my possession all the Italian I'd ever need to know.

But I felt like I was floating on air.

But I gave it up to have children.

But I love you, Samantha.

But I miss us. I really do.

But I rationalized that my new shoes...

But I really need to have sex tonight.

But I wasn't the only one.

But I wielded my power in a benevolent manner.

But I wondered, what was still buried...

But I would love to see you tomorrow.

But I'd go with someone who has a little more experience, like Sam.

But I'm kind of somebody...

But I'm not having sex. It's a kissing thing.

But I'm worried I might be starting to scare her off.

But I've been so lonely since I left home...

But I've been thinking about your article about men who date models.

But I've gotta be totally honest with you

But I've never seen it with someone like you.

But I've only gotten to know a particular fragment...

But if you don't go down on him, how do you expect him to go down on you?

But if you ever actually do manage to get someone in bed...

But if you're serious about a guy, then you have to keep him...

But in Manhattan, actually run wild on the streets...

But in this case...

But isn't delayed gratification the definition of maturity?

But it never gets released.

But it recently dawned on me...

But just as she reached the place Krishna called the gateway to life...

But Ken and I love each other very much.

But lately it seemed as if the entire city...

But men should not be allowed to take advantage of it?

But my cabinets were looking fabulous.

But Neville Morgan was not a man to be corrected.

But now I don't know if I want to see him again.

But now, it wasn't working. I wasn't getting the same rush.

But of course you can.

But pretty soon they were visiting china.

But really do it.

But seriously, I hope you call me back and...

But she's warm and unpretentious...

But someday this is gonna be the kid's room.

But somehow we wound up on different sides.

But somehow you just can't manage to...

But sometimes there's nothing better...

But that she was willing to overlook one flaw...

But that's exploitation!

But the question nagged me for days.

But the thing is this.

But then again, I'm dating a man who will never get married...

But then he wanted to read me his poetry and go out to dinner...

But there is one thing.

But there is something sexy about a first timer like Charlotte.

But there was nothing.

But they'd be sending over free drinks.

But this is your bus party.

But this one crossed the line.

But to tell you the truth, these days, nothing gets me down.

But two time on very special day.

But we're not sleeping together?

But were we getting into something we couldn't handle?

But while for me the idea of seeing another man would be like...

But who actually answered these ads?

But you do want to get married someday, right?

But you guys have fun, though.

But you haven't been shot.

But you know, he is a fruit.

But you're 32 now, so that's just stupid.

Butt ugly.

By a man she hardly knew.

By eating a box of Double Stuff Oreos.

By the middle of the next week, it was three times in a row...

By the time I got home, I was sure he'd left an apology on my voice mail.

By the time you reach your mid 30s you think, "Why should I settle?"

By, like, my enemies and shit.

Bye!

Bye!

Call me.

Call me.

Call me. I'm staying at the Carlyle with Peter.

Can I ask you, would any baby shower bother you...

Can I get anyone something else?

Can I have a kiss?

Can I join you?

Can I see you again?

Can we fuck the regular way?

Can we please talk about this over lunch somewhere else?

Can you believe anyone that beautiful can be that nice?

Can you believe I finally did it?

Can you imagine?

Can you melt them down into one decent gift?

Can you narrow that down a little bit?

Can you picture it, us with...

Can you take her to Connecticut?

Can't we just enjoy the party?

Can't you find a woman who can carry on a decent conversation?

Can't you just do it for me?

Candles from Urban Outfitter, dirty laundry, a pizza box.

Capote Duncan. He's supposedly some big shot in the publishing world.

Care to try some aged sheep's milk cheese from the Alps?

Carrie Bradshaw. I am so excited.

Carrie Held Hostage: Day Eight.

Carrie is one of the most fascinating...

Carrie writes this fantastic column in the New York Star.

Carrie, don't even go there.

Carrie, I want you to meet Mario...

Carrie, I'd like you to meet my boyfriend Carlo.

Carrie, Jared is the writer of the book Avenue B.

Carrie, just get over here.

Carrie, Miranda...

Carrie, that's great. Is it a date?

Carrie, this is Allanne.

Carrie, this is Julia Woods. Julia, Carrie Bradshaw.

Carrie!

Carrie! Did I miss it?

Carrie! What a surprise.

Carrie?

Carrie. Well, welcome.

Catholics, Episcopalian, Buddhists, Shakers, Quakers.

Chances are eight years ago you probably did.

Charlotte and Jack locked eyes at a black tie benefit for Epstein Barr.

Charlotte arrived at the secluded Connecticut home...

Charlotte broke it off then and there. It would never work.

Charlotte could never tell a decent lie.

Charlotte cursed tequila and forced Samantha into a cab.

Charlotte felt free to indulge her fantasy.

Charlotte had a new boyfriend. He had her big three:

Charlotte had heard about Noanie through a sorority sister...

Charlotte had made us all swear never to use it.

Charlotte hadn't been that excited since she tried on her cheerleading uniform.

Charlotte hated the "C" word.

Charlotte left us all behind, telling us she had another party to go to.

Charlotte quickly became intoxicated by his talent...

Charlotte suddenly realized all was not lost.

Charlotte sweetie, don't forget our gift.

Charlotte told me she thought she had played the entire evening flawlessly.

Charlotte told me she thought she had played the entire evening flawlessly.

Charlotte treated marriage like a sorority she was hoping to pledge.

Charlotte was practically engaged

Charlotte was receiving her own declaration of monogamy.

Charlotte was right. We don't really know the people we sleep with.

Charlotte, this is my wife, Gertrude.

Charlotte, you have no idea how sexy you are, do you?

Christ! When did being single translate into being gay?

Christmas in St. Barts.

Ciao, ciao, ciao.

Cigarettes.

Circumstantial, Jeff. I'm single.

Classmates from Steiner, Dalton and Brown...

Clean. You forgot clean. He's a clean guy.

Clearly, a part of the old Laney had survived.

Close enough.

Coffee.

Cohibas... that's all I smoke.

Come here!

Come here. Come back.

Come here. I want to show you something.

Come on in. Come in.

Come on, boy!

Come on, let's go!

Come on, maybe it's just a phase.

Come on!

Come on! Not all married women feel that way.

Come on. I mean, what do you want from me?

Come on. Let me watch this.

Come on. This is fun. I had no idea you had such a big family.

Come on. Wouldn't you rather be with a guy who'd kind and giving...

Come on. You're still young. You have plenty of time to have children.

Come right in. Barbara's ready for you.

Come?

Companionship, guilt, political asylum?

Complete and utter denial.

Completely unfair and usually bestowed...

Confused? Sad? Rejected?

Cool?

Could be intimidated by some unreal fantasy.

Could be.

Could ever be lonely.

Could he be more than a fling? Could he be a potential boyfriend?"

Could I date a man who would never get married?

Could look so unnatural.

Could look so unnatural.

Could you get me some more duck sauce, please?

Could you put Carrie back on the phone?

Couldn't hold her job and moved back to Wisconsin to live with her mother.

Couldn't tell if he was trying to fuck me or erase me.

Cupid has flown the co op.

Cute?

Cute.

Daddy's little Episcopalian princess in the arms of one of God's chosen people.

Damn.

Dancing for dyslexia.

Darling, what took you so long?

Dave?

Decided to place a personal ad.

Deep inside the mommies downstairs?

Definitely straight.

Definitely too much salt.

Depending on where you're coming from.

Derek, a.k.a. "The Bone"...

Derek, I would like you to meet a very dear friend, Carrie Bradshaw.

Designed by Coco Chanel herself.

Despite her best efforts to run free...

Despite never having sold a single painting.

Did all men secretly want their women promiscuous and emotionally detached?

Did Charlotte ever tell you about the rabbi?

Did I ever tell you about that jazz musician who lived with his mother?

Did I mention I'm sleeping with him?

Did I mention this was Skipper?

Did I tell you he wants to buy a painting from my gallery?

Did I tell you that Allanne designed the Fallen Angel bottle?

Did I tell you that Allanne designed the Fallen Angel bottle?

Did I wake you?

Did Stanford leave?

Did you do something different to your hair?

Did you know there's a couple humping outside of your window?

Did you see that? She was flirting with us.

Didn't mean my morals had to go down with it.

Ditching us now would be really bad form.

Divorced, French and almost uncomfortably handsome...

Do they know about this?

Do what l tell you to, Eagle Scout sex.

Do you actually think he believes I'm a model?

Do you ever have any conversations about money?

Do you forgive me?

Do you have a light?

Do you have a tampon?

Do you have any idea what happened to Derek last night?

Do you have to be a supermodel to get a date in New York?

Do you know anyone who's right for me?

Do you know that it has been, like, a year?

Do you like peacocks?

Do you mind if we just lie here?

Do you realize, if she were a man, not only would we be eating now...

Do you think I should make it a 50?

Do you think it means I should do it? Have a threesome?

Do you think it means something if Big and I are sleeping together...

Do you think that was meant to be some kind of coded mea culpa?

Do you think the pears in this tart are bosc or bartlett?

Do you think you'll ever...

Do you want to go this Saturday?

Do you?

Does anybody know how to drive?

Does this color turn you on?

Doesn't she look exactly like Deborah Kerr in An Affair to Remember?

Doesn't that seem like a waste of time?

Doing it upstairs at a party.

Don't be pissed, all right?

Don't be scared, miss. It's me, Tommy. I'm just leaving.

Don't beat yourself up. You had certain expectations and you're disappointed.

Don't get up. She's doing in vitro.

Don't I have a 3:00?

Don't listen to the dime store Camille Paglia.

Don't start crying. He's such a pussy.

Don't tell her I'm nice.

Don't tell me you're surprised by this.

Don't tempt me.

Don't worry about it. You can go in on mine.

Don't worry, sweetie. Don't worry.

Don't worry. I only tape models.

Don't worry. I'm perfectly capable of restraining myself.

Don't you have any friends that you can hook me up with?

Don't you just wanna lie like this forever?

Don't you think that's a bit obsessive?

Don't you wanna go out with a girl your own age?

Don't you wanna stand still with me?

Doubtful. I only just moved here from London.

Down to a smaller and smaller group.

Dreams are a good way to experiment.

During the next couple of hours, I put my journalistic skills to good use.

Each of these portraits...

Egg shell.

Either he'll have the upper hand or you will.

Either they're slime balls that are just out to get laid...

Elana.

Elizabeth was attractive and bright.

Enjoy yourself.

Especially when it came to real estate agents.

Even guys like me don't want guys like me.

Even his fucking dog is perfect.

Even if I did only get two hours sleep.

Even if I have to be a lesbian partner.

Even in her state of abject blackness, Charlotte was a dating optimist.

Even in the plow position, I could count on Samantha...

Even seven months pregnant, Laney couldn't keep her clothes on.

Even the firm's senior partner.

Every fiber in my thirty something being was screaming...

Every gay guy I know is running off to Hawaii...

Every night I'd light a candle and say a little prayer.

Every single night when you come home...

Every time she went on a scouting trip, she came back with some hot new group...

Everybody drink!

Everybody's talking about you. You are so great.

Everyone's leaving their options open.

Everything you wanted.

Everywhere I looked, people were standing in twos.

Evidently Stanford, tired of bars and blind dates...

Evidently, Charlotte had seen Shmuel's work in an exhibition...

Evidently, Samantha had had lots of sex...

Exactly!

Exactly.

Exactly.

Exactly.

Exactly. There's a reason for that.

Exactly. Which is why I'm never getting married again.

Exactly. Why can't she just use sex and a nice cocktail like the rest of us?

Excellent.

Excellent.

Except he had an ex wife named Barbara, who, I discovered, worked in publishing.

Except he's younger and much better looking.

Except here they were likely to forget it five minutes later.

Except it's not that funny since Betsy and her husband are getting divorced.

Except when a lawyer steals a base, he gets promoted.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Excuse me. Do you like this shirt?

Excuse me. Excuse me.

Excuse me. I'm sorry. Hey, Carrie.

Excuse me. Is this your hand on my knee?

Exhale and turn around into asana.

Expensive footwear.

Fabulous.

Fabulous. Fantastic, actually. And you?

Face it, ladies. If you're still single, you are not to be trusted.

Face reality and get married.

Faced with her own inadequacies...

Faith in myself.

Faith that all the withholding would stop.

Faith that he's say "I love you."

Faith that I would one day meet someone...

Fallen Angel.

Fantastic. Is there a man in the picture?

Fat, low fat, nonfat.

Fine. I'll leave.

Fine. I'll make an exception.

Fine. It just proves that I'm not ashamed of anyone I've slept with.

Fireplace and views.

First of all, there are so many goddamn gorgeous women in this city.

First, business, economy. Moe, Larry, Curly.

Five hour lunches. I remember those.

Five hours and two packs of gum later...

Five hours later, Charlotte's night was just beginning.

Five letter word. "To bring together." Hinge.

Five minutes of bodice ripping material out the window.

Five.

For a first date, Miranda felt like she was hitting it out of the ballpark.

For a gallery opening in Chelsea when...

For a one night stand.

For amazing sexual clarity.

For an East Hampton fuck fest at my summer home.

For better or worse, I had just established my rate...

For Brooke, every Saturday night was like the senior prom.

For chocolate bars and nylons.

For girls!

For her comfort level, she was even more moved by his restraint.

For Samantha, the shit was about to hit the phone.

For something or someone else.

For tearing off rock stars' pants...

For the same reason they don't ask the number of former sex partners:

For turning a desperate situation into a hopeless one.

For two weeks they snuggled...

For very cool people under 30 and this very cool writer wants to take me home.

For what could become another platonic sleepover...

Forget the math. Just don't fuck on a first date, you're fine.

Forty five minutes and three animal positions later...

Forty five minutes later...

Found ourselves at the nearby twenty something club.

Four city girls set off to visit the country mice.

Four friends looking for life and love in the big city.

Four hour conversations flew by in a space of 15 minutes...

Four minutes, Charlotte.

Four stars, great bread, disappointing wine selection.

Fourth and Bank and...

Fresh goat cheese from the Napa Valley.

Friday night at Chaos.

Friday night with a man who shared my passion for hot men in tights.

Friday night.

Friends?

From an increasingly hopeless situation, when suddenly...

From men who hit on me during their 15 minutes of fame.

From the moment I saw you at that wedding, I knew we'd have dinner.

From The Partridge Family.

From whom?

Front, back, who cares? A hole is a hole.

Frustrated and horny.

Fuck yeah. I'm due any day. What's one little drink gonna matter?

Fuck! I had this amazing dream.

Full frontal friend.

Gathered to toast the maiden voyage of my bus.

Gee, I'm flattered.

Getting a table at Balzac again.

Getting on the good side of his mother is like closing the deal.

Gilles is an architect from Paris.

Girls, isn't this fun?

Giuliani had them removed along with the homeless.

Give it a rest! You guys have seen enough of my tits.

Give me a minute. I just have to make a call.

Give me one reason.

Given every other model in town.

Glad you could make it

Go quick before the Times destroys it with a rave.

Go. I'm fine.

God bless.

God, I'd love to own my own gallery...

God, it makes me hard just thinking about it.

God, no. He's a total modelizer.

God, would you listen to yourself?

Good bye, Michael.

Good for you. Listen, this was a huge mistake.

Good investments and bad breath.

Good luck finding one.

Good night, ladies.

Good night.

Good night.

Good night.

Good old fashioned, eager to please...

Good taste and beautiful. Could it get worse?

Good!

Good.

Good. Good. I was just here with my posse having dinner...

Got some fresh juice and the good muffins.

Great news! Thank you, Miranda.

Great to see you!

Great.

Great.

Great. No, forget about me.

Great. Well, have a good dinner.

Groovy.

Growing up, the nuns told us sex was a sin.

Had been magically reduced to only two people...

Had his own investment firm...

Had Mr. Big discovered my weakness for great sex and greasy Chinese?

Had wonderful sex...

Half past midnight in a city that never sleeps...

Hampton houseguests are always required to sing for their supper.

Hang on.

Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday, dear Miranda

Happy birthday, dear Miranda

Hard.

Has he been working out?

Has monogamy become too much to expect?

Have a good flight.

Have I ever had fabulous sex with someone I didn't want to admit to?

Have you ever been in love?

Have you ever been with a man...

Have you ever seen any place like this? Is this to die?

Have you got an office or anything?

Have you tried taking a shower with him?

Having a meltdown.

Having been raised in the church of "be nice to people...

He called it a thing. He said, "Meet me...

He didn't have a prayer.

He didn't.

He gave Samantha the opportunity to combine her two greatest loves...

He goes to church with his mother?

He had a wandering eye. Wandered right over to my best friend.

He has a tiny little penis, but he knows exactly how to use it.

He has this thing for secretly taping his conquests.

He insisted on picking me up, but he's not supposed to be here till 11:00.

He introduced me to his mother as a friend.

He is a god, and I tell him so every day.

He is way too happening to be seen someplace borderline tired.

He is.

He just stood there, casual, happy, hanging out.

He left a message on my machine when I got home.

He never did call, of course. Bastard.

He never took her calls or returned her messages...

He obviously had seen something else he liked and gone after it.

He owned a talent agency and, at the moment, was down to a single client.

He paid in full. What more is there to talk about?

He said he was up to his ears and that he'd call her the next day.

He said order anything.

He said, "I miss you, baby."

He scheduled a rendezvous with the only respondent on a cold, Sunday afternoon.

He spooned me.

He took her to a town house he saw in Sunday's New York Times.

He turned out to be in high school.

He twirls!

He usually dates models, but, hey, I'm as good looking as a model...

He walks around his perfect apartment with is perfect suit.

He wants to go out this week.

He was a Hasidic folk artist from Brooklyn.

He was a trader at Bear Sterns...

He was acting very weird, like he... like he didn't want me to meet her.

He was American Classic; she was French Country.

He was like the flesh and blood equivalent of a DKNY dress.

He was one of the city's most notoriously "un gettable" bachelors.

He was passing through New York on his way to Brazil...

He was still just the Turtle in black.

He wasn't.

He wouldn't introduce me to his mother.

He, uh, called me crying.

He'd hop out of bed and shower.

He's a cute little fixer upper.

He's a good kisser and he's gonna do my taxes for free.

He's a sex maniac.

He's barely spoken to me. All of a sudden, it's "Chip."

He's coming to stop me ten seconds.

He's incredibly successful.

He's like a sweet little seal pup.

He's like a whole new person.

He's lost. We gotta get him.

He's never going to leave his wife for you. They never do.

He's not my boyfriend. He's just somebody I'm trying on.

He's perfect, perfect, perfect, and I'm the girl who farts.

He's really cute and really successful...

He's so beautiful that I find that sometimes I have to look away.

Heavenly. And I never thought I'd get there.

Hell, my lips were still swollen. Why this sudden craving?

Hello there, churchgoer.

Hello, Miranda

Hello! You're driving.

Hello?

Hello?

Hello.

Hello.

Hello.

Hello. Excuse me. Hello! We've been waiting 45 minutes.

Hello. Nice to meet you.

Hello. Oh, my!

Her backup dream man.

Her dream man...

Her face peeled off. That can't be good

Her house is beautiful!

Her life was a blur of rich men, designer clothes...

Her shrink had suggested she come three times a week.

Here it comes!

Here it is.

Here she goes again with "The Rules."

Here they come. Let's make a break for it.

Here we are.

Here we go.

Here you are, holding a tongue.

Here you are. We've been looking for you everywhere.

Here you come.

Here, pray.

Here, will you listen to this and tell me if you can figure out...

Here.

Here. Next round on me.

Here. Say hello, Jared.

Here. This one's on sale, half off.

Here's hoping.

Here's what.

Hey, babe.

Hey, boy! Come here, boy!

Hey, Carrie. How are you?

Hey, guys, wait for me!

Hey, guys! Wait, wait!

Hey, hurry. We're gonna miss the plane.

Hey, I resent that.

Hey, isn't that Mr. Big?

Hey, it's a vibrator. It's not like it's crack.

Hey, it's my sweetheart!

Hey, Jonathan.

Hey, just so you know, I would've gotten hinge on my own.

Hey, nice outfit. Is there gonna be belly dancing at the shower?

Hey, scoot over, will ya? Two stops:

Hey, Sean! What a surprise!

Hey, she's thinkin' about it.

Hey, Skipper here. Leave me a message.

Hey, Stanford.

Hey, Stanny.

Hey, Stanny.

Hey, sweetie, what happened? You couldn't find seats right on the runway?

Hey, this is Skipper. I'm in the street with Carrie.

Hey, what a surprise.

Hey, you guys, the entertainment has arrived!

Hey, you guys. Great to see you. What are you up to?

Hey, you okay?

Hi, it's me.

Hi, Laney!

Hi, Skipper, it's Miranda.

Hi, this is Miranda. Please leave me a message.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi. Excuse me just a second.

Hi. How are you?

Hi. I feel so privileged.

Hi. I'm Bernie Turtletaub, friend of the groom.

Hi. I'm Carrie Bradshaw. I'm an old friend of Mike's.

Hi. Nice to meet you. I've heard so much about you.

Hi. Thanks for meeting me.

Hinge.

His blue crab strudel was so fabulous, he didn't need one.

His dick is like a gherkin!

His family has this gigantic ranch in Argentina. Very, very wealthy.

His friends.

His name was Jonathan Bix.

His name was Michael Conway. He was from a good New York family..

His name was Ted Baker. He was 32, a sports medicine doctor...

His strangeness and the smell of his wool.

His wife.

Hit Off Broadway play Shower of Shame.

Hold that thought. I'll be right back.

Hold this.

Honey, did Carrie see your dick in the hall?

Honey, I need you to come over here and meet someone.

Honey, I really need you in the other room.

Honey, I'm a psychic. I'm not a shrink.

Honey, it's fabulous. Bravo.

Honey, no offense, but your breath...

Honey, we know.

Honey, you can't be serious.

Hoping for glimpses of their friends' husbands' dicks?

How 'bout if we start at the top and work our way down?

How about you, honey? Do you want a family?

How about you? Are you married?

How are you doing? It's good to see you.

How are you?

How are you?

How can you judge him till you spank him?

How could anyone that gorgeous be straight?

How could anything made by that God made body be considered sin?

How could I possibly sustain a relationship?

How did it go with you and Sam?

How did you manage to get a new boyfriend in a week?

How late?

How many of us out there are having great sex...

How many women are you dating?

How marvelous.

How often is normal?

How pathetic do I feel asking you...

How sad. Do you think we can get it to go?

How tacky is it to give the mother to be a fistful of cash?

How the hell did we get into this mess?

How well do we ever know the people we sleep with?

How'd you like to have dinner with my folks Tuesday night?

However, I did have a little experiment in mind.

I admit it was kind of a shock.

I adore trite.

I already said that. Well, enjoy it twice.

I also tried not to let it bother me that he took me back to Fung Wa...

I always feel so amazing after yoga.

I always wanted this pattern for formal dining.

I am not going to tell him until I know what l..

I am so not number nine.

I am the Luna Park Cafe. Meet me out front. Your name's not on the list.

I barely had time to shove a "good muffin" in my purse...

I began to fear that Miranda's sexuality was overpowering poor Skipper.

I began to realize that being beautiful...

I believe there is a curse put on the head of anybody...

I bet you have a beautiful cunt, dear.

I bet.

I call it the mid 30s power flip.

I call the power of all the saints.

I can see that.

I can wait in the hall.

I can't be hemmed in by rules. I go with my emotions.

I can't believe it. He's seeing other women.

I can't believe it's been so long. I've been meaning to call you.

I can't believe that you are working with another broker.

I can't believe the synchronicity. I was just thinking about you!

I can't believe what I'm hearing.

I can't believe you made Jon leave his own opening.

I can't believe you said that.

I can't believe you weren't gonna show me this apartment.

I can't believe you're freaking out over a name.

I can't do this.

I can't even commit to a long distance carrier.

I can't even open a magazine without thinking, "thighs, thighs, thighs."

I can't figure out whether the mushrooms are shitake or chantrelle.

I can't get inside.

I can't just blurt out what he asked me. It's embarrassing.

I can't pray and run.

I can't stay. I'm late for a meeting.

I can't take these crowds.

I can't talk right now.

I can't.

I can't. I don't know where you are.

I can't. I want children and nice bedding...

I cannot believe the two of you came down here to interrogate me at work.

I could crush anything with these big fucking hands, man.

I could maybe swing an hour between meetings.

I could smell it before you walked in the door.

I couldn't believe it.

I couldn't believe it.

I couldn't bring myself to tell her.

I couldn't decide whether Mike was being shallow or honest...

I couldn't help but notice how you move to the music.

I couldn't help but wonder...

I couldn't say I wasn't tempted.

I couldn't understand a word she was saying...

I couldn't wait to go out and take in the spectacular view.

I crushed this one guy. He had no face and stuff...

I decided I couldn't take the test...

I decided the only way to break free...

I decided to check out some more traditional religious types...

I decided to say good bye to Mr. Big.

I decided to stop avoiding the situation and take the grown up approach...

I decided to walk to clear my head.

I did allude to the fact that I was a bit cash poor these days.

I didn't call him the rest of the day.

I didn't feel a thing. It was like, "Hey, babe, gotta go. Catch ya later."

I didn't invite you.

I didn't know that all his buddies were gonna be married.

I didn't know that was gonna happen. Nobody told me that was gonna happen.

I didn't know what I was supposed to feel.

I didn't know what to say. There really wasn't anything to say except...

I didn't leave.

I didn't mean...

I didn't see Mr. Big for eight days.

I didn't sleep at all.

I didn't sleep very well that night...

I didn't tell her about my afternoon of cheap and easy sex and how good it felt.

I didn't think that was his type.

I didn't understand.

I didn't understand. Had I suddenly become the invisible woman?

I didn't wanna tell her I cancelled lunch with my editor...

I didn't want to disturb you.

I didn't. We just talked.

I discovered that Gilles was recently divorced...

I do not believe in plastic surgery. Well, not yet.

I do want to get married someday.

I don't blame myself. I blame the dress.

I don't even shower afterwards.

I don't know how you can date that younger guy.

I don't know what else I can do.

I don't know what I want, but I'm afraid if I don't you'll dump me.

I don't know what to do. I can't admit to having found this...

I don't know whether to take it as an incredible compliment...

I don't know, just a few... Seven days.

I don't know, maybe she's just busy. Am I not cute enough for her?

I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't know. Charlie Sheen?

I don't know. Could I get my change?

I don't know. Find out for me. I wanna see if I still have a chance.

I don't know. I can't help feeling...

I don't know. I don't know. It's bad, isn't it?

I don't know. I'm good at crossword puzzles.

I don't know. I'm not sure.

I don't know. It didn't feel sexual.

I don't know. It's something about him. You should see me around him.

I don't know. You look pretty gay to me.

I don't like putting it in my mouth. I have a very sensitive gag reflex...

I don't need a list. My friends are already in.

I don't remember filling out an application.

I don't remember, but they would, like, run at me...

I don't see them as much as I used to.

I don't sleep with men I've only known a day.

I don't think I can do this.

I don't think I'd be very good at this.

I don't think that I have been hit this hard since...

I don't think this is gonna work.

I don't think this is gonna work.

I don't understand that. You're such a nice guy.

I don't understand you women.

I don't understand.

I don't understand.

I don't understand. What exactly about me screams "whore"?

I don't wanna be the "up the butt" girl. Men don't marry the "up the butt" girl.

I don't want anything from you.

I don't want him to know that.

I don't want to be one of those 40 year old moms.

I don't.

I don't. I wish I could say I felt worse...

I envied Amalita.

I explore these sorts of issues in my column...

I farted in front of my boyfriend.

I farted.

I farted.

I feel like I know you from somewhere.

I feel like I met somebody I can stand still with for a minute and...

I feel so terrible. Listen to me. I'm a bad person.

I felt it was time to call it a night.

I felt it was time to stop all the speculation...

I felt like a fool. I had gone so far out on a limb with my feelings...

I felt like I had landed in a Claude Lelouch film...

I felt like I owned this city.

I felt like I was in my bedroom when I was 16...

I figured there was nothing to be done.

I find it fascinating that four beautiful flesh and blood women...

I forgot how much fun it is to just kiss, you know...

I found myself caught somewhere in between.

I fucked him too.

I fucked him.

I gave in. After all, it was already tomorrow in Paris.

I gave up sex three years ago.

I get it.

I get it. You're an architect and a comedian.

I get so lonely in the city.

I glanced down at my arm.

I got in deeper and deeper.

I got my period.

I got my period.

I got this three years ago in Aspen.

I gotta get up really early...

I gotta take this. I'll be right back.

I guess I should stop seeing other men.

I guess I've just been waiting all this time for a good kick in the head.

I guess it depends on what's normal for you.

I guess this means I'm not going to hell.

I guess you've got it all figured out...

I had a thought.

I had a very reassuring moment once with First Response.

I had a wonderful time.

I had gone from party guest to prisoner of war.

I had just experienced single bashing for the new millennium.

I had learned that Sean was the youngest of three brothers...

I had misgivings...

I had never felt so invisible in my entire life.

I had no idea they did an afternoon show.

I had outgrown the boys of my past...

I had reached my own transcendental state.

I had this sudden urge to call, but I'd just left him.

I hadn't dressed so quickly since the time...

I happen to love the way I look.

I hate doing it.

I hate doing it.

I hate it when you're the only single person at a dinner party...

I hate that word.

I hate them.

I hated that movie.

I have a friend who'd always gone out with extremely sexy guys...

I have absolutely no idea what happened to mine.

I have been dying to do something with an edge. This could be great.

I have been fucked every way you can be fucked.

I have been out with some of those guys... the short, fat, poor ones.

I have got to try this again with Kevin.

I have it in blue, black, pink.

I have low self esteem, but I express it the healthy way...

I have no doubt.

I have no idea.

I have no intention of using that. I'm saving sex for someone I love.

I have that dress.

I have to get up really early tomorrow.

I have to go. I'm sorry.

I have to masturbate three times a day just to make it through.

I have to run, too. I'll call you.

I have you.

I haven't been able to stop thinking about you.

I haven't dated in a hundred years. I haven't a clue.

I haven't heard from him since we spent the night together.

I heard about you.

I heard it was sinking.

I hope you find what you're looking for.

I hung up the phone wondering...

I I can't, Brian. I can't.

I invited Stanford to the ballet. I knew he was available.

I invited the girls over for poker.

I just came here to tell you that if you're embarrassed...

I just can't believe that you had dinner at Balzac.

I just didn't realize you were dating other women.

I just don't have that gay look.

I just had a five hour lunch with James.

I just have to tell you your home is beautiful.

I just love to show the creme de la creme.

I just need five minutes. I'm meeting Brian later and don't know what to do.

I just needed something to take the edge off

I just realized...

I just saw someone I want to say hello to.

I just think it might become a bit monotonous.

I just told her how you won't call me back.

I just took advantage of the situation...

I just wanna ask you for one small favor in return.

I just want to get married.

I just wanted to let you know I'm at this very cool party...

I just wanted to say it was great running into you today.

I just wanted to see my bus and get the hell out of there.

I just wanted to tell you it was so great seeing you guys.

I just... I didn't know. Where have I been?

I keep dreaming that someday he's gonna say, "Stanford, I love you."

I killed the last woman who talked to me like that.

I kind of have this rule.

I knew an addict when I saw one.

I knew he was gay.

I knew it.

I knew you would.

I know a great Thai place around the corner...

I know I was a big bitch, but you gotta know my hormones are going wild.

I know it. I've been with the firm for two years.

I know it's juvenile, but it bothers me. I'm attractive, smart. Right?

I know it's only been a couple of weeks...

I know plenty of cool, hip mothers...

I know where my next orgasm is coming from. Who here can say as much?

I know, I know, so sue me.

I know.

I know.

I know. I am trying...

I know. It's like "Undereaters Anonymous."

I left feeling powerful, potent and incredibly alive.

I left the table wondering why Mike didn't want to introduce me to his date.

I like it the way it is.

I like it, I go after it.

I like it.

I like it. It makes it special. Oh, there he is.

I like this new you.

I like to call "Sam Does the Married Guy."

I like to spend the whole day smelling like Miranda.

I lived a year in Paris and never ate so well, and cheap.

I love a big dick. I love it inside of me.

I love it. I really love it.

I love looking at it. I love everything about it.

I love my single friends. But now that I'm married...

I love my son. Andy is 11 months old.

I love my Stanford. He's a very sweet boy.

I love Sleeping Beauty! The music, the sex, the costumes!

I love that suit you're wearing.

I love that you're not my wife.

I love that, too.

I love you too.

I love you, but I can't.

I made these reservations weeks ago, and she's already been here.

I may know someone who's perfect for you.

I mean, am I maternal?

I mean, can you believe we... on the first date?

I mean, hadn't I had faith in us all along?

I mean, he's this perfect guy

I mean, hell, a guy once broke up with me because I missed a bikini wax.

I mean, I could really date him, and he couldn't date me.

I mean, I didn't plan that, you know? L...

I mean, if you want to get married, it's to have kids, right?

I mean, isn't it better to find out if the sex is good right off the bat...

I mean, it's all in the timing. You gotta brown the garlic...

I mean, life is not a Jacqueline Susann novel...

I mean, look. Look at this.

I mean, most of her friends are in dairy.

I mean, most of her friends are in dairy.

I mean, somebody should warn you.

I mean, that stuff is gonna be all worked out, of course.

I mean, that thing you do with your hips!

I mean, the sex was incredible.

I mean, the woman builds her dream house...

I mean, they don't want to be in a relationship with you...

I mean, we can see each other and still see other people.

I mean, we touch and cuddle...

I mean, what about my feelings?

I mean, what would people think?

I mean, you are like a sister to me...

I mean, you told me to have faith, but, see...

I mean...

I met him for another movie...

I met this gorgeous kid in Spy Bar last year. He was...

I miss the old times when everyone was alone.

I miss you, baby.

I miss you.

I missed you.

I most certainly can.

I need a sign.

I need a sign.

I need to get out of here.

I need toilet paper!

I need your dick now.

I needed a project to keep my mind from obsessing...

I needed some answers.

I never have. Sorry.

I never knew you were interested in writing children's books.

I never thought I'd see them again.

I never told Samantha the source of my newfound power...

I never would've gone out with him in the first place.

I offered to do it for this 30th birthday.

I only knew one thing... that's way too much Peter before coffee.

I own my own PR firm. You write a newspaper column.

I paced my apartment and tried not to think about our lack of sex when...

I pick up The New York Times and I read that he's married...

I practice "parmacharia," Tantric celibacy.

I practiced on a banana.

I pretended it was a popsicle, but I just don't like it.

I ran into Peter in the hallway without his underwear on.

I realize that Einstein's Law of Relativity...

I realized I had just entered an interesting chapter in my life.

I realized I was alone in a park at 3:00 a.m...

I realized it smelled like a cheap date you don't want anyone to meet.

I realized that I could leverage myself...

I realized then that the only inheritance Stanford was going to get...

I realized...

I really don't know what else to say to you.

I really like you. And tomorrow night after dinner...

I really shouldn't. Somebody might see.

I remember First Response.

I remembered another type of twenty something guy.

I said a "dinner thing."

I said don't mention it.

I saw the Met is opening a new Goya exhibit.

I searched her face looking for the light of recognition.

I see what you mean.

I see.

I see.

I seem to be the only person in New York...

I should have been jumping for joy, but I only felt a hard knot of fear.

I should never have farted.

I showed up at his apartment feeling sexy and confident.

I slept with him too fast...

I spent the next day sitting on a park bench watching children play.

I spent the next hour keeping Charlotte away from Laney...

I spoke to a woman with a master's in finance.

I stand by my choice.

I started reading your column after we met.

I stayed up all night questioning my faith in faith.

I still love the project.

I still talk to all my ex wives.

I stood there and waited for the obligatory...

I suddenly recalled my terrible weakness for gorgeous French architects.

I take that as a no.

I take that back.

I tell you what. Let me just make a quick phone call. Okay?

I think Allen's great.

I think Fung Wa's is the best Chinese food in the city...

I think he's someone I could actually marry.

I think I fell a little bit more in love with him.

I think I'd feel safer with a friend, with someone I could trust. Like Carrie.

I think I'm going to have to send myself home.

I think I'm gonna faint.

I think I'm in love with him...

I think it might be worse under there.

I think it works either way.

I think it's sad the way she's using a child to validate her existence.

I think it's the best idea I ever had in my life.

I think maybe that kick in his head scrambled his brains.

I think perhaps I have met you somewhere before.

I think she put her hand on my leg.

I think she was flirting with you.

I think that was Skipper's new girlfriend.

I think there's trouble. I mean...

I think these women should just forget about marriage...

I think they're stupid.

I think this might be it. I think this might be the one.

I think we need to talk about why you're asking me that.

I think we should order another one.

I think you are too beautiful to be a writer.

I think you should give up your life here...

I think you're luminous.

I think you're too charming to be an architect.

I thought he was gay.

I thought I had come to terms with my looks the year I turned 30...

I thought I said I'd try to make it for an hour.

I thought I saw you on the runway.

I thought it was pretty fuckin' great, but what do I know?

I thought it was the fact that you could behave like an utter asshole...

I thought it would be all scary and weird, but it isn't. It's pink!

I thought maybe if you weren't doing anything...

I thought she was fun

I thought we had a connection.

I thought we were having fun.

I thought you could handle it.

I thought you might like something to drink.

I thought you might.

I thought you said everything felt really comfortable and great.

I thought you said you had a business thing tonight.

I thought you were serious about this guy.

I thought you were spending the next six months in Brazil.

I thought you weren't talking to me for the rest of your life.

I told him you were the most beautiful...

I told Mr. Big I was on a deadline and I had to get home.

I told you you shouldn't have... Well, never mind.

I told you, it's a cult. We can't separate.

I told you. Don't tell me you don't remember.

I totally believe that love conquers all.

I tried not to let it bother me.

I tried to lose myself in work, but every time I stopped to think...

I turned into one of those couples we hate and I'm loving it!

I used to paint full nudes...

I wanna force feed her lard, but that's the difference between you and me.

I want to change a lot of it.

I want to go to church with you and your mommy. How about this Sunday?

I want to, but I can't. I mean, actually...

I want us to have anal sex.

I want you to know how much I appreciate your patience

I want you to know that that other woman doesn't mean a thing to me.

I want you to meet someone very special.

I wanted to capture the exuberance of youth.

I wanted to crawl under the covers and go right to sleep.

I was a career woman many, many years ago.

I was afraid she'd go spontaneously deaf.

I was already planning on returning them when...

I was as good as in.

I was beginning to float away on a sea of sweet potato puffs...

I was caught in the boy's dorm sophomore year.

I was embarrassed.

I was gonna say in Miss Saigon.

I was hooked. Gone.

I was hoping I'd see you here.

I was hoping you'd stay over.

I was no longer considered a person.

I was now an egg farm.

I was once with a guy the size of one of those little miniature golf pencils.

I was outside trying to get in for 30 minutes...

I was preoccupied.

I was ready to go.

I was so happy to hear from you, that we were still doing it...

I was speechless.

I was striving for noncommittal, but I was worried I had bordered on shrill.

I was struck by how a place so filled with nature...

I was struck by how a place so filled with nature...

I was that woman ten years ago...

I was trying you on.

I wasn't going to tell you this, but...

I wasn't thinking about it until he said I couldn't. Now it's all I think about.

I wear little outfits..."sexy Carrie," and "casual Carrie."

I will break my ass for you, sweetheart.

I will not be the first one to speak.

I will put her over my knee, and I will snap her like a twig.

I will snap her.

I wish that were true.

I wish there was something I could do.

I wish they made this in my size.

I woke up wanting more, or maybe not.

I won't compare it to anything, because everything else has always ended.

I won't mind.

I wonder...

I wondered if there wasn't some kind of physics for beauty.

I wondered.

I wore the naked dress on our first date.

I would never sleep with a married man.

I wouldn't know how to return it anyway because he didn't leave me his number.

I write a column called "Sex and the City."

I'd always dreamed it could be.

I'd forsaken my girlfriends for my new boyfriend.

I'd have to kill her.

I'd have to say Sophia Loren.

I'd just had sex like a man.

I'd like to know who that woman is.

I'd like to move back to lowa and have kids and be a cop.

I'd like to return these.

I'd love that.

I'd love to have my own shop too.

I'd love to, but I'm really trying to cut back.

I'd love to, but it's really getting late.

I'd love to.

I'd parlay that $1,000 into a trip to Venice...

I'd pitch her a steamy, bodice ripping paperback which she'd probably reject...

I'd really like it if we could become friends.

I'd totally given up on the idea that you could actually talk to men.

I'll be back tonight. You want to do something?

I'll be right back.

I'll be right back.

I'll call you

I'll call you later.

I'll call you.

I'll get up.

I'll get you a cab.

I'll get you a cab.

I'll give you the grand tour.

I'll introduce you as my girlfriend when I'm sure.

I'll kill you.

I'll meet you at the elevator, okay? I need to...

I'll pick you up at 8:00.

I'll sit down and read a whole magazine from cover to cover.

I'll start. Veronica Lake, the year she made Sullivan's Travels.

I'll take a look.

I'll take your chin and raise you a...

I'll take your thighs and raise you a chin.

I'll tell you what. I'll buy the tickets.

I'm a creative director of an ad agency...

I'm a passionate person. His career is all I care about.

I'm a romantic. I just have so much feeling.

I'm afraid he'll pull out garlic and a cross.

I'm beginning to think I may not be the marrying kind.

I'm beginning to think the only place one can still find love and romance...

I'm celibate.

I'm concerned that you've been drafted into a ring of high class hookers.

I'm confused. Why would he do that? Did he want to have sex with you?

I'm doing a column on closet Presbyterians. You know any?

I'm exactly the same. I love my life.

I'm exhausted.

I'm expecting a phone call...

I'm frankly surprised that someone as young as you is familiar with my work.

I'm going back up there. Excuse me.

I'm going into the bathroom now...

I'm going to go to the bathroom, and then we're leaving, all right?

I'm going to say good bye to the pastor. It was lovely meeting you.

I'm gonna get a soda. You want a soda?

I'm gonna go ask her to join us for dinner. Excuse me.

I'm gonna go take a shower.

I'm gonna go with zero.

I'm happy for her.

I'm having dinner with you.

I'm here with a friend. She's waiting for me at the bar.

I'm here. Now, what's going on?

I'm in a twenty something apartment.

I'm in love with you. Now we can be together.

I'm in the sand box with Charlotte, Sam and Carrie and they won't play with me.

I'm into museums, blow jobs, theater...

I'm just calling to confirm tomorrow night. Are we still on?

I'm just gonna go jump in the shower, and then, boom, I'm all yours.

I'm just gonna write the whole thing off as a bad date with a cash bonus.

I'm just not so good at people puzzles.

I'm just not that sexual a guy.

I'm just saying that men and women are equal opportunity exploiters.

I'm just so happy.

I'm just using the last of it to make the coffee.

I'm kind of losing mine, so...

I'm late for a meeting with my editor.

I'm late for a thing.

I'm late. I missed my period.

I'm leaving anyway.

I'm Libby Biyalick. It's so nice to finally meet a friend.

I'm like a model who's taken the high road.

I'm like two rentals away from a free pound a Gummy Bears.

I'm like, well...

I'm no one religion in particular. I'm open to all.

I'm not gonna ditch you.

I'm not gonna replace a man with some battery operated device.

I'm not interrupting your work, am I?

I'm not like me. I'm like "together Carrie."

I'm not ready for a full blown relationship thing.

I'm not sure. I don't know.

I'm not too heavy, am I?

I'm not your private stud horse, Miss Dial A Fuck.

I'm on total ovary overload. Which kind do I get?

I'm only here for the weekend...

I'm over at this coffee shop on 73rd and Madison.

I'm really sorry, but I'm going to have to cancel.

I'm scared if I keep using it, I won't be able to enjoy sex with a man again.

I'm serious.

I'm serious.

I'm so broke these days I might take you up on that offer...

I'm so loving that. How come you never told me?

I'm so not finding that funny.

I'm so tired of going through women.

I'm sorry, I really don't.

I'm sorry, sweetie.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I thought...

I'm sorry. I'm gonna have to say good bye.

I'm sorry. I'm hungry.

I'm sorry. It's been a really busy week.

I'm sorry. It's just... It's funny.

I'm sorry. It's my fault.

I'm sorry. What were you saying?

I'm sort of a sexual anthropologist.

I'm starting to feel like it's me.

I'm sure you get asked this all the time, but what is your problem?

I'm sure you'd go right to the top of the list.

I'm telling you, married people are the enemy.

I'm the kind of guy, I see something...

I'm tired of being jerked around.

I'm totally self conscious.

I'm totally wiped out.

I'm trying to get a hold of a Miss Carrie Bradshaw.

I'm very flattered.

I'm warning you.

I'm way behind on my column anyway.

I'm way beyond that point.

I'm, like, fucking in love with you.

I'm, like, in love with you, you know that?

I've already had two of these, so we're gonna be stopping a lot.

I've always wanted to do it in my parents' bed.

I've been at Blockbuster renting videos. It's tragic.

I've been dating him a week and a half.

I've been involved in a monogamous relationship for over a year now.

I've been offered trips to Aspen, weekends in Paris...

I've been out with lots of guys...

I've been smoking cigars for years...

I've been talking to your friend Charlotte. She's great.

I've been totally thinking about you since we broke up.

I've been trying to call you. You still have my passport.

I've been waiting out front for 30 goddamn minutes

I've been with the firm eight months. I haven't once seen you with a guy.

I've done the merry go round. I've been through the revolving door.

I've got 20 minutes before my racquetball game.

I've got intense thoughts, but I can't keep them in my head long enough...

I've got this great source that sends me Hondurans. Do you want to try one?

I've gotta retire soon.

I've had it with the whole gay scene.

I've just never been in this situation before.

I've lost two sisters to the motherhood. I know what I'm talking about.

I've never been to Venice.

I've never considered myself a horn dog before...

I've never done a threesome.

I've never seen him in my life.

I've told Gilles all about you.

I've turned away 20 so far. People are actually crying.

If a guy kind of likes me?

If Charlotte was actually considering a threesome, who wasn't?

If he goes up there, there's gonna be a shift in power.

If he goes up your butt, will he respect you more or less?

If he so much as suggests what she's suggesting...

If I could get him to show at the gallery, it would be an incredible coup.

If I had $50 with me, do you think I'd give it to that girl?

If I had to, could I do this?

If I hadn't waited this long to have a baby, that name would be mine.

If I make it to four months, I'm humping one of you.

If I see another crepe paper stork, I'm gonna rip its cardboard beak off.

If I see Christy Turlington, I just wanna give up.

If I'd fucked James already, who knows where we'd be.

If men like Nick are dating models, what chance do ordinary women have?

If models could cause otherwise rational individuals...

If she fucks on that couch, she buys it.

If she was going to take the plunge, it was now or never.

If the sex is good, who cares what anybody thinks?

If their house wasn't right on the beach, I would have hated them.

If they were doing the 30 sexiest women under 30...

If you am, you am.

If you can ask for it, you're probably too old to have it.

If you can fuck the girl in the ad for the skirt?

If you fuck him on the first date as he can if you wait until the tenth.

If you keep talking like that, I'm gonna charge you by the minute.

If you turn into one of those married assholes...

If you want to get these guys, you have to keep your mouth shut...

If you're a successful single woman in this city, you have two choices:

If you're busy, we understand.

If you're gonna get a vibrator, at least get one called "The Horse."

If you're looking for material, you're dating the right man.

If you're not back in five minutes, I'm coming after you.

Immediately after sex...

In a city like New York with its infinite possibilities...

In a city of great expectations, is it time to settle for what you can get?

In a city of infinite options...

In a city of perfect people...

In a couple of days we're going on vacation. We can talk then.

In a holding pattern for at least five dates.

In a kingdom far away...

In a room full of Chanel.

In a room where everyone was gorgeous, cool and under 30...

In an attempt to secure his latest work.

In an effort to get her mind off sex...

In bed.

In between the Versace show and dinner at Moomba...

In college. I was drunk. I woke up in someone else's bra.

In England, looking at houses together would have meant something.

In fact, I believe she used the word "maniac."

In fact, I think everyone at this table could use a lot of fresh pepper.

In fact, we're not even really lesbians.

In four hundred dollar shoes.

In her effort to help...

In lieu of any actual social life of their own...

In New York is the gay community.

In some cultures, heavy women with mustaches are considered beautiful.

In that case, what I perceive as his feelings for me may only be...

In the gray morning light, everything looked completely different.

In the tristate area?

In the universe.

In their natural habitat.

In this case, it merely felt exhausting.

In.

In...

Incredible.

Inside looking for you for 20, leaving me with just enough time...

Instead, we have breakfast at 7:00 a. M...

Interesting dress.

Internationally, I would imagine.

Into a man she could fall in love with.

Into a nice piece of jewelry...

Investment bankers and the women who hate them...

Invisible electric fencing.

Invited me to the Hamptons for the weekend.

Iogical guy in every respect but this.

Is directly proportional to your age.

Is everything okay?

Is giving you a professional advantage because they find you charming?

Is gonna make it all the more special for us now.

Is he dating any one model in particular?

Is it normal to be in the same bed and not do it?

Is it okay if I come over?

Is it possible to be addicted to a person?

Is it that men have an innate aversion to monogamy...

Is leaving it.

Is like having a rent controlled apartment overlooking the park:

Is like the war in Northern Ireland.

Is like throwing food to the starving.

Is my hair too shiny today?

Is of a woman who has touched my life.

Is she still barhopping and bed hopping?

Is sometimes even sexier than taking it off?

Is there a host that I might talk to?

Is there a secret cold war between marrieds and singles?

Is there a woman here aside from me who weights more than a hundred pounds?

Is this a painful topic?

Is this normal? What's wrong?

Is this really intimidating to any of you?

Is to live in the moment and not worry about the future.

Isn't it great? I can eat anything I want. Jealous?

Isn't it great? I can eat anything I want. Jealous?

Isn't it weird that you're thinking of sleeping with someone you don't know...

Isn't it?

Isn't that how you got the couch from me?

Isn't this fun? It's like hell with a cover charge.

Isn't this nice? Us together?

Isn't your arm getting tired?

It all started a couple of weeks ago...

It appeared that Laney Berlin's invisible electric fence...

It can be nice.

It certainly was.

It didn't mean anything. It was just sex.

It doesn't have to be like that.

It doesn't matter. I'll start.

It doesn't.

It got to be a problem. They decided to take action.

It had a brief comeback in the 90s, but as the millennium approaches...

It is hot all the way from Houston and West Broadway...

It is in.

It is like a model bomb exploded in this room tonight.

It just means you're happy with Allen, right?

It just recycles.

It makes absolutely no difference.

It means I'll have to find them somewhere else.

It only takes a second.

It says "two headed snake." You pull over.

It seems Stanford had invited everyone in his Rolodex.

It was 3:00 a.m. In the Church of Disco...

It was a promotional photo for my column...

It was a tough town. Hot places had the life span of a medfly.

It was about three months ago.

It was all ego.

It was almost as if they were dating accidentally.

It was hard to imagine that anyone so beautiful...

It was just like that bar in "Cheers" where everybody knows your name...

It was Kurt Harrington...

It was like Noah's Upper West Side rent controlled ark.

It was love at first sight.

It was Mr. Big: Major tycoon...

It was my pal Mike Singer.

It was nice. It was the way...

It was one of those awkward relationship moments...

It was only a matter of moments before he invited her to his farm upstate...

It was so real. I can't stop thinking about it.

It was so sexy, so forbidden.

It was the last straw.

It was the night of the 12th. On the East Side...

It was the Turtle wearing Helmut Lange.

It was the Turtle. A Manhattan legend known for two things:

It was then I realized I was having coffee with the marrying guy.

It was then that Samantha realized that even with all her effort...

It was true. I no longer felt a thing for Kurt.

It was your average $100,000 wedding.

It wasn't a choice. I'm human. It happened.

It went on the market at midnight...

It would've been so cool if I hadn't looked back

It'll be fun. We've never even been to visit her in Connecticut.

It's a "fuck" thing.

It's a children's book for adults.

It's a huge fantasy of Mark's.

It's a little bit of heaven.

It's a little orange.

It's a miracle! I'm healed!

It's a pleasure.

It's a private joke. Go forth and date.

It's a triple cream from France.

It's a wobbly table. Guess I have the touch.

It's all about age and biology.

It's all about control.

It's all about what you want out of life.

It's all I can think about.

It's all married couples.

It's all right.

It's all right.

It's all right. I'll take the omelette.

It's always better to marry someone who loves you more than you love them.

It's amazing what sequins on a stick can do to free up inhibitions.

It's amazing what you'll do to be with these models.

It's beautiful.

It's beautiful.

It's beautiful.

It's been an hour. How can that guy still be...

It's been three times. It's perfectly normal.

It's been wonderfully fulfilling.

It's been years. I haven't seen you since you were...

It's bitter, but it definitely has possibilities.

It's called "Sex and the City."

It's delicious.

It's even got a remote. How lazy do you have to be?

It's fabulous. I feel like an enormous weight has been lifted.

It's got nothing to do with age.

It's how regular people are when they're on vacation.

It's intimacy that's the bitch.

It's just I never thought of you as the church type.

It's just so cute. I hate my nose too. It's too big.

It's just this guy's cheap ploy to watch you be a lesbian for a night.

It's just, I have this little substance abuse problem.

It's just...

It's like buying a dress and keeping the tags on.

It's like every bullshit nice thing you do...

It's like he travels with his own personal lighting director.

It's like I'm obsessed.

It's like picking teams for dodgeball all over again.

It's like she's got this power over me...

It's like that guy, Jeremiah, the poet.

It's like the older we get, the more we keep self selecting...

It's like the riddle of the Sphinx.

It's me.

It's me. I know it's me.

It's Miranda. She's got me totally whacked.

It's my name, my secret baby name...

It's nice

It's nice. Very nice.

It's not illegal.

It's not like models don't have brains.

It's not like we're throwing out our schedules or anything.

It's not my favorite thing on the menu, but I'll order it from time to time...

It's not that big of a deal, is it?

It's not the most important thing in a relationship.

It's not, and I'm beginning to chafe.

It's okay. Don't worry about it.

It's over. I told my wife.

It's Skipper. I told him I was here.

It's so brutal out there.

It's so competitive. You won't believe what happened to me last week.

It's so romantic!

It's so sad when that's all you have.

It's Stanford.

It's straight love that's become closeted.

It's the Bellini baby basket!

It's the best personal ad I've ever seen in my life.

It's the closest I've ever come...

It's the hostess at Balzac...

It's the latest thing. My sister has it.

It's the only thing we can't talk about.

It's these Chinese herbs I'm taking. You know, for longer life.

It's this, right?

It's tits on toast, baby, but you make it work.

It's too depressing.

It's too painful.

It's true. It's true, okay? I'm obsessed.

It's very strange when the life you never had flashes before your eyes

It's way easier to screw a model than a regular girl...

It's your call, but don't do it just to make Jack happy.

Jack says that I have a fire inside me.

Jack wants us to do a threesome.

Jack was perfect for her.

James has a small dick.

Jared, have you met Carrie Bradshaw?

Jared, how are you?

Jealous?

Jeff.

Jeremy, no!

Jerry, who Samantha met at Brooke's wedding...

Jesus, Carrie! Come on!

Jesus, Carrie! That's it. I've heard enough about the fart.

Jesus.

Jesus. Look at that beautiful woman.

Jon. J O N. No "H," no last name.

Julia.

Just a minute!

Just a second.

Just as I had reached the moment of no thought...

Just as long as we don't skip dinner.

Just as you were about to write her off as a Park Avenue Pollyanna...

Just back from her honeymoon, she was all business: The business of marriage.

Just be cool. You don't care.

Just because Venice was sinking...

Just completely hurt and offended.

Just don't do it.

Just don't mention the name Shayla.

Just get in the car. Please.

Just go over there and fuck his brains out and he'll forget all about it.

Just go.

Just hanging.

Just imagine how fat she must be.

Just make sure the other woman isn't a friend.

Just put them down.

Just some couples, nothing fancy.

Just take it, period.

Just tell me I'm the one.

Just tell me.

Just three slices of wedding cake. You jealous?

Just to save on rent.

Just unzip and get over here.

Just when I thought I would have to do the unspeakable...

Just you and me.

Just...

Katrina.

Keep going

Keep me posted.

Ken was 37, a wine importer...

Kept bumping into one another.

Kevin, this is my good friend Carrie.

Kids?

Kind of fantasies.

Kiss to make it better.

Kitchen. You can't miss it. Room with the stove.

Know what I mean?

Knowing that I'm pumping my ideas into the world.

Kurt was just like I remembered...

Ladies, I have an announcement.

Ladies, I'd like you to meet the Rabbit.

Laney Berlin. You can't really describe her.

Laney did A&R for a record label...

Laney, come on. Come back. Don't do this.

Laney, it's not who you are anymore. It's all right.

Laney, maybe we should think about getting you home, all right?

Laney, show us your tits!

Laney, we need you!

Last night after Michael took Charlotte to the Philharmonic...

Last night my friend Miranda got invited to a dinner party...

Last time I saw Patience, she was shoving me on a bus.

Late one night, Jack popped the inevitable question.

Late that night in the Church of Disco...

Later I spent the most incredibly romantic afternoon with Gilles.

Later that day I was relieved to discover...

Later that day, the cream of New York...

Later that night we all went downtown for a party.

Later that night, back at the brier patch...

Later that night, Charlotte was determined to prove she was stronger...

Later that night, Miranda gave me the lowdown on her day.

Later that night, Skipper Johnston met me for coffee...

Later that night, the three of us tracked Samantha to the ladies' room...

Later that week the "crossword puzzle" asked me...

Later that week, I met Brooke.

Later that week, Miranda and I compared notes.

Later.

Leave it to me to find the only religious guy left in Manhattan.

Let me ask you something.

Let me get that door for you.

Let me get the door for you, miss.

Let me get this straight. Your picture is going to be on a bus?

Let me just be clear here. You want to do a threesome with me.

Let me show you how it's really done.

Let me tell you something.

Let us pray.

Let your breathing work with you.

Let's be honest.

Let's celebrate.

Let's experience everything the city has to offer.

Let's find Max.

Let's go!

Let's go.

Let's go.

Let's go.

Let's just keep 'em where I can see 'em, all right?

Let's just put the roller down and go in the other room and talk.

Let's just say it. It's the naked dress. You're obviously gonna have sex tonight.

Let's not lose perspective.

Let's not talk about the past.

Let's see, there's me, Julia...

Like every woman consumed with a relationship problem...

Like family functions when you're the only one that's not married...

Like I'm only a particular fragment of the kind of person...

Like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Like it?

Like it's some sort of consolation prize for not letting me in his life.

Like lottery winners or extremely successful people who are 27.

Like maybe his nose.

Like the human equivalent of a sexy junk bond.

Lisa.

Listen to me! The right guy is an illusion. Start living your lives.

Listen to me. You love your wife.

Listen, here's our card.

Listen, I hope I didn't give you the wrong idea.

Listen, I want you to come and meet the world's most fabulous man.

Listen, Skipper...

Listen. We should have a real first date.

Little Cathy and her magic cigarettes.

Live an empty, haunted life of stunted adolescence.

London? Really? That's my all time favorite city.

Long distance phone call, transatlantic.

Look at her, the poster girl for low self esteem.

Look at how crowded it is. What a sham.

Look at me! I'm an old man at 34.

Look at that Charlotte.

Look at them.

Look at you two. It's a perfect match.

Look at you two. You're beautiful.

Look up. Good, good.

Look who came up for air.

Look, Carrie told me that you were quite sexual.

Look, I can't meet you guys for dinner tomorrow night...

Look, I do the PR for this club...

Look, I have to do things on my time frame.

Look, I understand where you're coming from...

Look, I'm just saying, with the right guy and right lubricant...

Look, I'm not sure you understand...

Look, Sean...

Look, you tell me you have an ex wife.

Look! Oh, it's so cute.

Look.

Look.

Look. She's not beautiful...

Look. The little bunny has a little face like Peter Rabbit.

Looks, manners, money.

Love and a commission. She couldn't have been happier.

Luckily, my friend Stanford Blatch had a client in the hottest show in town.

Lucky me, twice in one week.

Lunch with my favorite couple, David and Lisa.

Made her feel more attractive.

Magical.

Major dream boat, and majorly out of my league.

Marilyn Monroe, before the Kennedys got to her.

Marilyn Monroe.

Mario's family has one of those gorgeous palazzos...

Marissa?

Married people don't hate singles.

Married women are threatened because we can have sex...

Martini straight up or with a twist?

Marvelous. Going through my second divorce.

Max. He's an old friend of mine. Remember, Becky's his second wife.

May I join you?

Maybe I should leave.

Maybe I'm not perfect. Maybe I don't fit into your perfect life...

Maybe it doesn't matter.

Maybe it would bring us closer.

Maybe it'll help me go into labor.

Maybe it's about fear, fear of the unknown.

Maybe it's just his fantasy life.

Maybe it's maturity or the wisdom that comes with age...

Maybe models could only be attracted to ordinary humans.

Maybe not today.

Maybe she's more your taste.

Maybe the cold war isn't about hate.

Maybe the fight between marrieds and singles...

Maybe there was such a thing as having it all.

Maybe they're wood ear.

Maybe this wasn't my target audience.

Maybe threesomes were the relationship of the future.

Maybe two models repelled.

Maybe we can do it again sometime.

Maybe we could have dinner sometime.

Maybe we should start tagging your married men...

Maybe we wanted to show it off. Like a monkey.

Maybe we were never meant to do it with only one other person.

Maybe you could show me the town.

Maybe you should propose to me, and we'll all live happily ever after.

Maybe you're on your knees, but you got 'em by the balls.

Maybe, you know, I thought we could have dinner some night.

Maybe.

Maybe.

Me too. We're all such big fans of your column over at Vogue.

Me, gorgeous with big boobs.

Me? L...

Me? What did I do?

Me. Can I get you a drink?

Meanwhile downtown...

Meanwhile uptown, Charlotte wondered...

Meanwhile, across town at the corner of Nirvana and West Third...

Meanwhile, across town things were winding down.

Meanwhile, at a bar downtown...

Meanwhile, Charlotte York was having a splendid evening with Capote Duncan.

Meanwhile, downtown...

Meanwhile, in a park downtown...

Meanwhile, Miranda spent another wonderful evening with Ted...

Meanwhile, Samantha had been busy guest starring in a show...

Meanwhile, Samantha was about to have her own encounter with the third kind.

Meanwhile, somewhere below 14th Street...

Meanwhile...

Meet me for a drink thing."

Meet me in front of your apartment in ten minutes.

Meet my friend Jack.

Meeting a friend's new boyfriend for the first time is always tense.

Meeting you is without a doubt the high point of my career.

Melissa.

Men aren't that complicated. They're kind of like plants.

Men in their 40s are like the New York Times Sunday crossword puzzle:

Men take women they don't want to be seen with in public?

Metaphorically, I mean. With the Rabbit.

Michael left Charlotte no doubt about his

Michael was upset, but Butterscotch seemed pleased.

Might be a sign that celibacy's not for you.

Mike found himself very uninhibited.

Mike had been dumped by Fiona Brooks, a cellist for the Philharmonic...

Mike told me everything that afternoon while I helped him pick out sheets...

Mindy.

Miranda and I went shopping.

Miranda and Syd's last inning double play got the attention of everyone...

Miranda chose life...

Miranda confronted him, and it didn't take him long to fold.

Miranda considered how much easier her life would be if she were in a couple.

Miranda couldn't resist the vision of herself...

Miranda had accidentally detonated some kind of Catholic guilt bomb.

Miranda had agreed to be fixed up on a blind date.

Miranda had given this topic some thought.

Miranda had rented a five hour Danish documentary...

Miranda had worked on a big successful merger.

Miranda looked at Skipper.

Miranda needed to keep her hands busy as well.

Miranda suddenly realized she was dating "Catholic Guy."

Miranda told me later that she thought he was too nice...

Miranda waited for the dead bolt to drop...

Miranda was gonna hate Skipper.

Miranda was obliged to attend her firm's annual softball game.

Miranda went to get a movie and another pound of Gummy Bears.

Miranda, this is Syd. Syd, Miranda.

Miranda. I was afraid you wouldn't come.

Miss?

Modelizers are a particular breed.

Modelizers are obsessed not with women, but with models...

Models are a lot looser than you think.

Money is power. Sex is power.

Monogamy is fabulous. It gives you a deep and profound connection...

Monogamy is on the way out again.

Monogamy suddenly began to seem like a quaint notion.

Morning.

Most guys just think you're dumb, but I'm really very literary. I read.

Most men are threatened by successful women.

Most of the time, yeah.

Most of the women who answered our ad, they were kind of...

Most people would classify Amalita as Eurotrash.

Move over.

Mr. And Mrs. Get it on.

Mr. Big and I had gotten comfortable enough to really sleep together.

Mr. Big and I were actually doing sleep overs.

Mr. Big, who else?

Mr. Big.

Mr. Marvelous.

Mr. Mood Swing. It's a total lifesaver

Mrs. Blatch.

Must have been a hell of a beautiful day.

My accountant says that it's best to go with low risk stocks.

My apartment's just around the corner.

My best buddy and I did everything together.

My body feels so open, so alive...

My book just got a kick ass review in Entertainment Weekly.

My buddies are giving me a big housewarming on the 12th.

My column.

My desire overcame my fear.

My ex girlfriend picked it out for me.

My ex girlfriend picked it out.

My ex wife.

My father and my ex girlfriend were, like, dead or something.

My feet are killing me.

My first born?

My friend Miranda was dating Thomas John Anderson...

My friend Patience and her husband...

My friends think I'm shallow. Sometimes I think they're right.

My God! They're trompettes!

My God. Why?

My grandmother gives everyone their inheritance when they get married.

My life was suddenly shit...

My lover and I have a kind of '90s monogamy.

My mother and I do, just the two of us.

My mother.

My mother's not feeling very well.

My parents met on a fix up...

My period, four days late.

My plan was simple.

My pleasure.

My problem? Just that I had a dream and you killed it, in a nutshell.

My wife and I are having a dinner party on the 12th.

My wife and I haven't has sex since the baby was born.

My wife will be disappointed.

My Zen teacher also said the only way to true happiness...

My Zen teacher told me that there was nothing like yoga to quiet a busy mind.

Named Cathy, Little Cathy.

Neither did the real estate market.

Neville was making his yearly pilgrimage to Manhattan...

New York City is all about sex.

New York is a city filled with places to worship.

Nibbling his ear lobes? How sweet.

Nice color. Ecru?

Nice paint.

Nice seeing you. Bye.

Nice to meet you.

Nick dates models?

No "H," no inhibitions.

No big deal. I'd rather stay home with the Rabbit than go out, deal with men.

No biggie.

No fair. Do it over.

No fatties, please.

No fear, no pity, no pointing.

No guy buys a classic six on the Upper West Side...

No kidding. About what?

No matter how good I feel about myself...

No one has breakfast at Tiffany's, and no one has affairs to remember.

No one knows.

No one special.

No one was more perfect than Brooke.

No problem, 'cause the bartender's a buddy of mine.

No problem.

No question. Guys were infatuated with threesomes.

No sooner had the words come out of my mouth...

No wonder the city never sleeps. It's too busy trying to get laid.

No yolk.

No, 'cause that would mean everything he ever said...

No, but I've read your column. Nice shit.

No, but mostly we just have sex in the afternoon.

No, he's in there giving a neck massage to a Versace model.

No, honey, you're a woman, and men don't like women to be human.

No, I am not going to tell him...

No, I don't wanna go back there.

No, I don't.

No, I know I can do it. Just give me one more chance.

No, I mean, literally.

No, I never date models.

No, I think it's starting to work.

No, I won't.

No, I'll do it.

No, I'm kidding. I'm joking.

No, I'm serious. We could both use a vacation.

No, it does.

No, it's just...

No, it's not a cold war. It's an out and out battle.

No, it's not so easy.

No, it's not you. It's just...

No, it's not. It's a mess.

No, no, no.

No, no, no. Of course you are.

No, no. I'm done with it.

No, sweetheart. I don't even want my own kids.

No, thanks, but maybe another time.

No, that's not true. I don't want to. Or maybe I do.

No, that's not what I meant.

No, they saw me. I have to say hello.

No, we can't

No, you didn't.

No, you're beautiful.

No! But if your friends won't go down on you, who will?

No! I'm sensitive...

No.

No. Isn't that crazy?

No. It's just she's not someone I date openly.

No. Sorry, I can't.

No. This is not me. This is me reacting to your perception of me.

No. Too quick is sleeping with him on the first date. That's too quick.

No. We just kissed for five hours...

Nobody in New York notices a bus until it's about to him them.

None of which was secret.

Nope.

Nope.

Normal is the halfway point between what you want and what you can get.

Not a bad looking girl. Don't you think?

Not a drop. Not even half a drop.

Not a lot of other women.

Not bad. Can't complain. You?

Not even for me?

Not first. Ultimate. And I think I'm in love.

Not if that's what it takes to compete.

Not quite a date, five letters, starts with a "T".

Not really. I mean no!

Not really. Ruth, this is Sam. Samantha.

Not really. You?

Not tonight at least. Nope.

Not with someone older than 35, 'cause you have to have kids right away...

Not yet.

Not yet. No. I thought you were going to bring Libby.

Nothing and no one could get in my way.

Nothing like you.

Nothing.

Nothing.

Nothing.

Nothing. I'm just being un peu stupide.

Now I have an Internet lover.

Now I just yell at the gardener...

Now I only see him on Super Bowl Sunday.

Now I'm starting to feel like I'm an outcast in the outcasts.

Now imagine a three year foreplay...

Now release and breathe.

Now take the shoes, and we'll talk soon.

Now that I've got Jack hooked up, I'm single again.

Now would be a good time to wipe that horrified look off your face.

Now you're talking!

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to visit the ladies' room.

Now, is there one question in particular?

Now, you cannot put this in your column.

Now, you see, that is the reason that I don't wanna go down this road.

Now...

Number three, he knows I carry textured Trojans with a reservoir tip.

Number two, he's not wearing a wedding ring.

Odd how normal can sometimes feel so uncomfortable.

Of all the restaurants in Manhattan, why did you take Libby to Fung Wa?

Of course he does. Every guy does.

Of course I did.

Of course we are. Hi. I'm Samantha.

Of course you are, Skipper. You're adorable.

Of course you can. And you can pay me back never.

Of course you do.

Of course you haven't. You in a threesome? You won't even wear a thong.

Of course, he died penniless and single.

Of course, I'm monogamous.

Of course, knowing us, we'll skip the movie.

Of course, my definition of monogamy includes sex with prostitutes.

Of course.

Of course.

Of course.

Of course. Phyllis. How are you?

Of every great idea I've ever had.

Of men... which is perfectly legal.

Of the painter Neville Morgan...

Off to take her best shot with Mr. Big.

Oh, and look at her dog!

Oh, and look at her dog!

Oh, and we have to stop and see the Renoirs. I love the Renoirs.

Oh, calm down. It's research.

Oh, Carrie, I'd like you to meet Misha.

Oh, come on, honey. Nothing's better than sex.

Oh, come on.

Oh, come... Wait a minute.

Oh, God, don't remind me.

Oh, God, no. I broke up with her the second that you called.

Oh, God! Oh!

Oh, God. I hate that.

Oh, God. I'm freaking. I got to stop.

Oh, God. More friends.

Oh, God. Oh God. Oh God! OH GOD!

Oh, God. Oh, Kurt.

Oh, good luck. The bar is packed.

Oh, here.

Oh, hi, Skipper.

Oh, hi. How are you?

Oh, honey, gray area.

Oh, honey, I can't wait any longer.

Oh, honey, I'd love some fresh pepper.

Oh, I can't make your party tomorrow.

Oh, I got a marriage proposal last night.

Oh, I loved it. I'd have sex mooring, noon and night.

Oh, I see. Anyone I know?

Oh, I understand.

Oh, I'm gonna go over and say hi.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Oh, it's adorable!

Oh, it's her machine.

Oh, just a couple guys.

Oh, listen, l...

Oh, look at that one.

Oh, look at that.

Oh, look, everybody!

Oh, man, that's so sweet.

Oh, man!

Oh, man! That's the kind of thing... I love Samantha's parties.

Oh, my God, it's gorgeous.

Oh, my God!

Oh, my God!

Oh, my God! I'm so sorry!

Oh, my God! It's the Bellini baby basket!

Oh, my God! Joe!

Oh, my God! Look at the size of that thing.

Oh, my God! This has to be Stanford.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Don't turn around.

Oh, my God. I apologize.

Oh, my God. I was mortified.

Oh, my God. She winked at me.

Oh, my God. You're doing tequila shots?

Oh, my.

Oh, no. I wanted to introduce you to some of my friends.

Oh, no. No, no, no.

Oh, please, stop! This is so sad.

Oh, really?

Oh, really? What type am I?

Oh, right.

Oh, shit.

Oh, something came up. He's not gonna meet me.

Oh, sorry.

Oh, sorry. I have to go back to work.

Oh, that's great

Oh, that's my roommate.

Oh, the nuns.

Oh, this is my friend Stanford.

Oh, Toto, I don't think we're in Manhattan anymore.

Oh, well, forget it!

Oh, wow! Is this you?

Oh, yeah! The good muffins.

Oh, yeah?

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Completely. But I'll give you a call.

Oh, you can see all the flaws from this angle.

Oh, you have one of these leather club chairs. I love these.

Oh, you know, just writing the column. The usual.

Oh! I don't have a baby!

Oh! Sure.

Oh! You were in the dream...

Oh. "On the way to the bathroom."

Oh. Special Olympics chairwoman.

Oh. Well, listen. About what happened at your beach house...

Oh. Well, thanks.

Okay, bye.

Okay, I owe you.

Okay, I'm ready.

Okay, Linda Fiorentino fucking that guy up against the chain link fence.

Okay, next stop is gonna be 62nd and Madison.

Okay, okay. I'll see what I can do.

Okay, tell me.

Okay, this is Rebecca...

Okay, we should be going. See you.

Okay, we were attracted to younger men for various reasons.

Okay, when?

Okay, words are essential. Tell me exactly how he worded it.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. If you were 25, that would be adorable...

Okay. See ya.

Okay. You're driving down the road. You see a sign.

Old movie stars you'd have liked to fuck when they were young.

Old movie stars you'd have liked to fuck when they were young.

Older women don't want to settle for what's available.

On a particularly blah Wednesday night.

On his back, on his side, on his face.

On street corners...

On the Grand Canal in Venezia.

On the Nuremberg trial.

On the way home...

On the West Side, a trio of single gals...

On Tuesday, he called with some bad news.

Once Charlotte realized she couldn't get what she thought she didn't want...

Once they isolate you from the herd, it's all over.

Once upon a time in a magical land called Manhattan...

Once upon a time, an English journalist came to New York.

Once upon a time...

Once we get the breath under control, we're shopping for a new wardrobe.

Once... One time a day...

One day she woke up, and she was 41.

One day you're gonna wake up, and you're not gonna recognize yourself.

One minute I can be walking down the street, totally cool..

One month was interesting. Two months was numbing.

One of the best things about living in a city like New York...

One warm spring day...

Only I can't really show it to the public.

Or "marrying and moving to East Hampton" a lot?

Or as an incredible insult.

Or ashamed to be involved with me in any way...

Or Diane Sawyer or even Rosie O'Donnell

Or even remember.

Or is it just another way in which we deny our feelings...

Or is it more than that?

Or is this one worse because it's Laney's?

Or more importantly, why? Didn't you like it?

Or so she thought.

Or they fall in love with you instantly. It's pathetic.

Or was going out to dinner simply a diversionary tactic...

Or was it just that I was "figured out"?

Or when you two eat off the same fork, I just...

Or you can say "screw it," and just go out and have sex like a man.

Or, as she used to call it, sex with an expense account.

Oral sex is God's gift to women. You can get off without a worry of pregnancy.

Other times I think, "Hey, I'm fucking a model."

Others choose to, what?

Otherwise you're finished. It's kind of like being around dogs.

Out to lunch with Stanford Blatch...

Out.

Over the next week and a half, I met Sean for a movie...

P.S. Congratulations.

Paddy, another round.

Paddy, honey, where are those beers?

Paid a visit to the gallery.

Pamela, it's beautiful, but it's a little out of my price...

Panicked at the idea of spending another firm function labeled as a leper...

Part of me wanted to grab Samantha and make a run for it.

Patience and Peter were the perfect married couple.

Patience went out to get juice and muffins.

People are always telling me things I don't want to hear.

People getting it. People trying to get it.

People put too much emphasis on the importance of sex.

Perfect. Great sex without wondering what it will do to your relationship.

Personally, I'm loving it up to the point where the guy wants me to swallow.

Pick three cards, face down with your left hand.

Please forgive me for having dinner with that other woman,,?

Please!

Please! Think about the money we spend on shoes.

Please?

Please.

Please. If it happens, it happens.

Please. It's obvious.

Plenty of people should want me for a threesome.

Plus I own my own business.

Plus the equal luxury of treating men like sex objects.

Plus, he owns his own business, and he's got 300,000 in the bank.

Plus, the sense of power is such a turn on.

Plus, they have cute butts.

Polite and respectful on 300 count Egyptian cotton sheets.

Populated by more than seven million fascinating individuals...

Pregnant lady showin' her tits!

Pretty great, huh? Can I pick 'em or what?

Prick.

Probably 'cause my dad had this thing for her.

Probably. My dad had a thing for her.

Promise me that you won't work with any other broker.

Psychic to the stars and a cosmic connection...

Puberty is a phase. Fifteen years of rejection is a lifestyle.

Puff?

Pure Mr. Big obsession.

Push their food around and pout.

Put it in.

Putting on a caftan, reciting vows...

Quiet.

Rarely ask about their dates' religious backgrounds...

Ready, girls?

Reality check. A guy can just as easily dump you...

Really good now.

Really?

Really?

Really?

Really?

Really?

Really?

Really?

Really?

Really? He's very cute.

Really? Oh, I never noticed.

Really? That's funny. Big doesn't believe in marriage.

Really? What happened?

Really? You're lucky, because at least you know what happened to your dream.

Really. With who?

Reflected in Skipper's slightly smudged lenses.

Reflected projections of my feelings for him.

Relax, 'cause once Todd or Shayla comes around, you'll never stop cleaning up.

Relax! It'll be fun!

Relax. There's nothing wrong with your relationship.

Relax. You're just in a dry spell.

Remember that day you wore the white dress and we got all the flatware?

Remember that feeling, like if you left Manhattan...

Remember that guy I was going out with? Oh, God, what was his name? Drew.

Rick did have a slight competitive edge

Right after the gifts.

Right away she hooked up with one of the city's typically eligible bachelors.

Right now I'm researching an article about women who have sex like men.

Right now, I've got to get my mother home. Okay?

Right there.

Right?

Right.

Right.

Right. But if you're not part of the "Beauty Olympics"...

Right. You weigh, like, nothing.

Roll over on your backs. Take goddess pose.

Ross is so hot right now.

Ruth won't even get on top.

Salt. Yeah.

Sam? Who's named Sam?

Sam's "no muss, no fuss" affair was starting to feel very mussy.

Samantha and I showed up at Balzac.

Samantha and Laney had a long standing rivalry.

Samantha and Siddhartha were sipping green tea...

Samantha and the Turtle?

Samantha began to feel things she hadn't felt in a very long time...

Samantha decided to channel her frustration at yoga.

Samantha decided to treat herself to a night of great music.

Samantha demanded nothing less than the same consideration...

Samantha did something only Samantha could do.

Samantha didn't believe in monogamy...

Samantha gave me a look like I had sold her to the enemy...

Samantha had a particular knack...

Samantha had participated in for months.

Samantha had the kind of deluded self confidence...

Samantha is totally drunk. I've gotta get her out of here.

Samantha Jones never missed a major fashion show

Samantha left with the Turtle, Brooke left with a better gift...

Samantha proceeded to give me a rundown of her night with Jon...

Samantha realized as long as she dated someone younger...

Samantha said a little prayer that he was kidding.

Samantha spent the afternoon having multiple yo gasms

Samantha tried desperately to believe that love was stronger than sex.

Samantha uttering those words to us...

Samantha was a guest star. Series regular was not in her contract.

Samantha was a New York inspiration.

Samantha was impressed. The Turtle had attempted a joke.

Samantha was obsessed with the idea of a new apartment.

Samantha was preparing to see God.

Samantha, everybody in here is in their 20s.

Samantha, I cannot believe that you would give this up on purpose.

Samantha, I don't understand you.

Samantha, Jon "no "H", Sam and I...

Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte had all stopped by...

Samantha, that's great.

Samantha? Hey, Samantha!

Samantha's P.R. Firm was handling the opening.

Same time, same place. Just you and me.

Saturday afternoon in bed with a man who shared my passion for passion.

Saturday night. In an effort to save money...

Saturday night's dinner came and went with no call from Big.

Saturday, 10:30. The hottest new restaurant in Manhattan.

Say it's not the...

Says who? I mean...

Scene of our postcoital dinner.

Scheduled to run on the side of a bus.

Sean Connery.

Sean is the greatest guy, and he love kids.

See if they're free, 'cause Big's got this dinner thing, so we had no plans.

See that buddy over there?

See you around sometime, I hope.

See you later. Bye.

Seeing you made me remember how much fun we used to have.

Seeks Scully look alike for abduction fantasy.

Self protection and closing the deal are paramount.

Send me an answer.

Send me the truth.

Serious?

Seriously?

Seriously?

Sex and real estate.

Sex has stopped. He hasn't called.

Sex is a barometer for what's going on in the relationship.

Sex with Barkley.

Shayla? Did you say Shayla?

She and Jack had just had another fantastic date...

She bought pinot noir from me.

She cannot do this to us.

She chased him through every disease in New York

She could continue not to come at all.

She couldn't get any more dates. She had a complete physical breakdown...

She couldn't imagine going on without it.

She decided it was time to put an end to her suffering.

She decided Samantha was too drunk to get home alone...

She decided to confront Thomas John Anderson as soon as he dried off.

She didn't actually work for a living, yet possessed a dazzling sexual power...

She didn't ask him home.

She didn't want to end the evening too abruptly.

She does runway now, but I think she's gonna be huge someday.

She does.

She gave up twenty somethings right then and there.

She gives birth on that couch, she buys it.

She got Samantha upstairs and safely to bed.

She had just spent a wonderful night with Ted...

She had reached the end of her path and her patience.

She had to make a phone call.

She is a real find.

She isn't a hooker.

She made an appointment to see Noanie Stine...

She means have you and James done it yet?

She mentally Scotch taped her dream house back together again.

She met a Wall Street investment banker, married him...

She never heard of me.

She never lets me spend the night.

She realized that this was her moment.

She reasoned that since I was there once...

She routinely slept with good looking guys in their 20s.

She said I couldn't understand it. I'm single.

She seemed all right.

She seems happy.

She simply refused to give in to the idea...

She successfully screwed a guy in under two minutes.

She threw an l don't have a baby shower...

She told me she met somebody else who doesn't have my problems with intimacy.

She took a cab to a part of town never mentioned in the New Yorker.

She took some drastic action.

She totally won't return my phone calls. Did she say anything about me?

She turned back and decided not to enter.

She was an interior designer who only dated A list guys.

She was finally back in her monogamous relationship.

She was looking to add a lesbian couple to our circle.

She was not at all prepared for what she found.

She was not the guest star in this fantasy.

She was one of the only people I knew who thought that proximity to beauty...

She was one of the only women he'd ever met...

She was smart, beautiful, and she got me.

She was supposed to have sex with Sid Vicious and move to heroin.

She was the date of Nick Waxler...

She would always be older.

She yearned for the time when dinner was followed by dessert, not lubricant.

She'd be crazy not to be in to you.

She'd say something so right on, you'd think she was the Dalai Lama.

She'd think he was mocking her with his sweet nature...

She'll be right back.

She'll juggle, she'll spin plates, but she won't give head.

She's a friend I once traveled with.

She's a hooker with a passport.

She's got a point. It's the right thing to do.

She's insane.

She's just not the one I see myself with.

She's like an international party girl.

She's not supposed to move at all.

She's so sad.

She's stunning. And I should know, because, frankly, she stunned me.

She's...

Shit! I spaced. I forgot to buy her a present.

Shit.

Shoes.

Shook Charlotte's beliefs to the core.

Short of sleeping their way to the top.

Should I ask her to join us?

Shouldn't be punished just because I can't budget.

Shouldn't we be dating men our own age?

Shouldn't you be spending the night with some girl from the show?

Shows how much you really care.

Shrewd move, Counselor.

Shut up!

Siddhartha was helping Samantha along her newfound path.

Since he didn't think Libby was that gorgeous...

Since it existed in a pure state exempt from the judgment of the world?

Since the '94 Montrachet.

Single people give married friends tidbits from their sexual escapades.

Sir, we're talking "up the butt." A cigarette is in order.

Sit down, join me!

Sit down. I'm a huge fan of your work.

Six months later, that exact same speech...

Skipper and I just had the most incredible meal.

Skipper Johnston was hopelessly smitten with Miranda Hobbes.

Skipper, come in.

Skipper, come on in. What is it?

Skipper, you didn't have to do that.

Skipper!

Skipper. Hi.

Slippery gloves.

Smart girl.

So all I have to do to meet the ideal man is give birth to him.

So am I.

So by the time you're an eligible man in your 30s...

So call me. I'm staying at the Four Seasons with Carlo.

So can I.

So every Sunday... church.

So he gets in the cab and slides up next to me.

So he was feeling particularly vulnerable when...

So help me, she fucks on my couch, she buys it.

So how long have you been seeing her?

So how long have you known Nick?

So I did what any writer would do. I pulled an idea out of my ass.

So I guess you couldn't avoid a threesome...

So I just got into the habit of taking a shower after I...

So I keep her a secret.

So I told her I didn't understand why she was so upset.

So I walked. I walked 48 blocks...

So I'll call ya.

So in your world, it's always sixth grade.

So like, how come you haven't been returning any of my calls?

So long as you're here, I could sketch you this afternoon.

So maybe it's supposed to be a loan?

So now you have to call me back. You better call me back!

So ready for anything.

So that's it?

So that's what that was about.

So that's why we went there.

So they constructed this whole bullshit theory...

So this is where you live.

So we would talk about art and sex and the Torah.

So what am I? Your intellectual beard for the evening?

So what are we doing today?

So what do you want to be when you grow up?

So what exactly about my head pissed you off?

So what have you discovered about these men...

So what's happening?

So what's the big deal? It's just a fling.

So what's the problem?

So where do you...

So you advocate a double standard.

So you and me...

So you thing the water serves as a retro baptism kind of thing?

So you think it's just because they think you're in a couple?

So you think it's really possible to pull off this whole...

So you're going to the dinner?

So you're saying it's easy to meet them?

So you're saying you're attracted to your girlfriends.

So, are you telling me...

So, Carrie, can I see you again?

So, do you like this shirt?

So, how is everything?

So, how is it being married?

So, how's life?

So, I think it's so cool that you write.

So, I'll see you tomorrow.

So, I'm dying to hear your pitch.

So, ipso facto, I can't be interesting?

So, isn't Brian great?

So, really, can I call you sometime?

So, the four of us get into a cab, only they won't let me sit in back with them.

So, then, enjoy your dinner.

So, what are you doing next Saturday?

So, what do you think of her?

So, what have you been doing lately?

So, what's it like to kiss with that thing in?

So, when she got married...

So, where are you going now?

So, which church does his mother go to?

So, who is the fabulous mother in the hat...

So, whose very crowded apartment are we in?

So, you seeing anyone special?

So?

So...

So...

So...

Some guys don't give you a choice.

Some men just take it so personally if you don't.

Some of the greatest romances of all time began with sex on the first date.

Some of them treat it as a competitive sport...

Some people read palms. Charlotte read real estate.

Some people take coffee breaks, I take jerk off breaks.

Some people, like me, choose to grow up...

Some perfect little woman who never passes gas under his $500 sheets.

Some scuba gear...

Someone has always been there before you.

Something looks different.

Sometime.

Sometimes cottage cheese.

Sometimes I catch myself actually posing. It's exhausting.

Sometimes I climb up into the kids' tree house...

Sometimes I think I should just marry a woman and get all the money.

Sometimes it's just nice to lie with someone.

Sometimes there is nothing harder in life than being happy for somebody else.

Sometimes there's no better feeling than knowing you only have one.

Sometimes they bring you down...

Sometimes three women a day, and I was always ready for more.

Sometimes you got a souffle...

Sometimes you just have to give it a little space...

Sometimes you need a second opinion...

Soon.

Sorry, I don't smoke.

Sorry.

Sorry.

Sorry. I haven't hung it yet.

Sorry. This is not gonna happen.

Sorry. You're not on the list.

Sort of.

Sort of. I'm...

Sounds like a trendy sideshow act.

Sounds like you're selling toilet bowl cleaner.

Speaking of Bellinis, I'm gonna have a big drink.

Speaking of secret sex...

St. Lazarus.

St. Rosa. Send me your guidance.

Stanford and Allanne worshiped the same God...

Stanford badgered me into at least meeting his grandmother.

Stanford Blatch was one of my closest friends.

Stanford invited everyone he knew...

Stanford tells me you're a writer.

Stanford, cute, huh?

Stanford, he's an underwear model.

Stanford?

Stanny, be a dear. Go in the kitchen and get me some matches.

Stay in bed. Order room service.

Still convinced that marriage plus baby equals death...

Still, it was the creme de la creme of New York whipped into a frenzy.

Stop complaining. At least you can take care of yourself.

Stop it! You are not going to clean up at your own shower.

Straight up.

Straight?

Stretched all the way to Manhattan.

Style.

Suddenly became a convert.

Suddenly I felt like I was wearing patchouli...

Suddenly I felt the wind knocked out of me.

Suddenly I was interested.

Suddenly my column was the last thing on my mind.

Suddenly, I had to concentrate on breathing.

Suddenly, reality hit.

Suddenly, the guys are holding all the chips.

Sunday morning. A time for rest. A time for relaxation.

Sunny day.

Supplies were dwindling...

Sure you will.

Sure, I saw some red flags...

Sure, it'd be great to have that one special person to walk home with...

Sure, it's all fun until you get to know each other.

Sure.

Sure.

Sure.

Sure.

Sure.

Sure.

Sure.

Sure.

Sure.

Sure. I have to get up really early too.

Sure. I was just...

Sure. I'll go pack my jet ski.

Sure. It was nice talking to you, Samantha.

Sure. This is Samantha. Samantha, this is Elaine.

Sure. Who hasn't?

Surprise!

Surprise.

Sweet, suburban school teacher seeks two men to fulfill her wildest fantasies.

Sweetheart, he's a man, not a brownstone.

Sweetheart, if you're gonna get all choked up about it...

Sweetheart, men give, women receive.

Sweetheart, this is the first time in the history of Manhattan...

Sweetie, forget about him. You are going to be on the side of a bus.

Sweetie, I just spent $395 on a pair of open toed Gucci's last week.

Sweetie, over here!

Sweetie, what is it?

Syd and I aren't really a couple.

Take it off!

Take your shot!

Talented and beautiful women in New York.

Talented and fascinating woman in New York.

Tall, proud, respectful...

Taxi!

Taxi! Taxi!

Ted didn't take Miranda home that night.

Tell him they make a cream for that.

Tell me about it.

Tell your mum I hope she feels better.

Ten million men are going to be drooling over you on their way to work.

Ten minutes and a couple of cocktails later...

Terrified of going to Mr. Big's...

Than an unstable, oversexed prick who only wants to get laid?

Than I wondered if they were true.

Than it did for small, rat infested studios running at $1000 a month.

Than meeting your single girlfriends for a night at the movies.

Than not doing it when you're not with someone.

Than selective serotonin re uptake inhibitors.

Thank God.

Thank God. Who needs the trouble? This is ideal. No muss, no fuss.

Thank you for saving my immortal soul.

Thank you for tonight.

Thank you so much. We really had a great time.

Thank you very much.

Thank you, Max.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you. Excuse me for a second.

Thank you. Excuse me for a second.

Thank you. I know it's a big change.

Thanks a lot.

Thanks a lot.

Thanks a lot. I hate my nose.

Thanks for a great day.

Thanks for inviting me.

Thanks, James.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Thanks. Bye.

Thanks. I'm using this room as an office now...

Thanks. So do you.

That afternoon I dragged my poor tortured soul...

That afternoon was a first for Samantha.

That at least one eligible bachelor got his kicks off the runway.

That caused men like Ross Perot to run for president...

That day, Tim popped the question.

That depends. What are your expectations?

That depends. What are your plans for the frosting?

That elusive and rare Manhattan man whose sights were set on marriage.

That he didn't have my phone number.

That I didn't realize I was standing out there alone.

That I interpreted as sincere is subject to interpretation.

That I made up when I was 11 for my daughter when I had her.

That is so not going to happen.

That is so sweet.

That isn't a good sign.

That it's totally turning her off.

That meant "bring your own baby."

That men secretly hate pretty girls because they rejected them in school.

That might be a good idea.

That move is what there famous for.

That night at dinner, I knew I would have to break the news to Mr. Big.

That night at the Attention Deficit Disorder Masked Ball...

That night I faced the tribunal.

That night I thought I could put the whole Barbara thing out of my mind.

That night she had an eye opening experience.

That night, Charlotte got out her wish box...

That night, Miranda and I had plans to join Charlotte...

That night, Miranda finally got her validation.

That night, Samantha went on a date with a flesh and blood man...

That night, they made love the Charlotte way...

That only your closest friends can inflict on you...

That promotes impossible standards of beauty.

That Saturday, also known as "Seven Days Late"...

That she exploited to her full advantage.

That she wasn't going to settle for herself.

That she would never get married.

That should make for an interesting column.

That some woman's gonna be able to make Andy happy?

That the body was designed to experience.

That the truth...

That they would only get it up for giraffes with big breasts?

That very same night, something absolutely amazing happened to Miranda.

That was before.

That was Charlotte speak for "I'm spending the night with my vibrator."

That was me...

That was one of the most amazing meals I have ever had. Thank you.

That was really great.

That was really...

That was the first night we slept together and didn't make love.

That was the thing about Charlotte.

That was totally nuclear, and it was surrounded...

That was wonderful.

That was, like, so great.

That wasn't supposed to happen.

That way when women ask how big you are, you can say, 'Fourteen feet'.,,

That we can no longer see each other.

That weekend, I was out with a man...

That women have had as much money and power as men...

That would be hard. That would be really hard.

That would make a kick ass song, wouldn't it?

That you sometimes want to club.

That you would give up a woman who really cares for you...

That you're in love?

That'll work.

That's a shame.

That's all right. I don't mind if you keep seeing her.

That's another thing. You didn't tell me that you're still talking to her.

That's Betsy and her boy Harry.

That's different. Not doing it when you're with someone means much more...

That's funny, Skippy.

That's it. I'm never going to touch that thing again.

That's just a judgment call.

That's my yeshiva.

That's no lie.

That's not sexy, it's starvation.

That's not true.

That's okay. I just wanted to say...

That's okay. She's adorable.

That's pretty clear.

That's right.

That's right.

That's right. I'm taking him to Bliss for a facial.

That's some dream.

That's starvation in the best restaurants.

That's the argument men have used since the dawn of time to exploit women.

That's the big trick.

That's the kind with nuts in it.

That's the least of it. You know what?

That's the only proper way to trade sex for power.

That's the problem. I'm too nice, you know?

That's the Times critic. I'd better go.

That's true.

That's true. You're his type, but you broke up with him, remember?

That's Vanessa. That's Tanya.

That's very nice of you, but I just can't accept these.

That's what I hear.

That's why Ken's fucking me.

That's why you must come immediately... before it's all gone.

The advantages given to models and to beautiful women in general...

The baby shower.

The baby's applying to Yale next fall.

The blow job tug of war.

The cab money I'd left on the table?

The camera.

The canvasses you're about to see...

The closest Charlotte had ever come to getting screwed on a plane...

The corporate guy.

The cunt.

The dress that led me down the garden path with Mr. Big.

The dress. The dress led me on, had a life of its own.

The entire way home, Charlotte berated herself for being so foolish.

The faces of brides and grooms, children and grandchildren...

The first thing that they see is...

The first time he was tired.

The floors need to be stripped and the curtains are...

The food was terrible, and we were talking to each other like strangers.

The future possible mother of your children...

The girl the couple gets to come in, screw and leave.

The groovy guy.

The guy we met in the street, and I couldn't remember his name...

The head guys didn't go for Little Cathy. But fuck 'em.

The idea of you touching another woman...

The idea that Samantha could possibly get married before she did...

The incredibly beautiful and intelligent type.

The invitation said BYOB.

The island of Manhattan is a cozy village...

The jock guy.

The loathe of your life is at the bar.

The M2. Goes right down Fifth.

The magazine's throwing us a party tomorrow night at Luna.

The man had slept with half the perfume ads in September's Vogue.

The months apart had shed a new light on him

The more he mocked me, the more I became convinced that this idea was genius.

The more Miranda analyzed, the worse her nightmares got.

The most powerful force...

The most powerful woman in New York is not Tina Brown...

The next day, I realized how childish I was behaving.

The next day, the flesh and blood Barbara asked me to lunch.

The next morning I was brought back down to Earth...

The next morning I woke up feeling rested and fabulous.

The next morning, he woke up and felt at ease...

The next morning, Miranda discovered a shocking sex secret of her own.

The next night when I met Charlotte for dinner...

The next two times, l...

The one who doesn't wear any underwear?

The ones who don't fear you pity you.

The only downside is it takes the air out of my tires.

The only thing hotter than sex is not having sex.

The only time I ever heard anyone mention going into one...

The only way to do a threesome is to be the guest star.

The other day, Derek and I were walking past his billboard...

The party had turned into a preview...

The pathetic, live for the moment single girls...

The plan was simple. Just get a look at the mother...

The problem is expectations.

The problem with monogamy, it's just so incredibly dull.

The question is...

The question remains... Is this really a company we want to own?

The rabbi?

The Rabbit. Give us the Rabbit.

The real fun begins.

The really good kisser guy.

The reason we had the threesome is because we were both looking...

The relationship will never be anything more than just sex.

The right guy comes along, and you two here, this whole thing...

The room service is one thing, but the money... uh uh.

The sex is so awesome that it's, like...

The source of all life...

The space for romance.

The street entrance is the front entrance.

The sun, the sand, you and me. You waiting on me.

The thing is, I'm dying to meet his mother.

The thing is, she's smart, incredibly sweet, and sex is great.

The things you gotta do in the name of research.

The trick is, you gotta treat them like they're regular girls.

The truth is, I blame myself.

The truth is, I needed to escape.

The truth is, I was dying to sleep with him...

The truth is, I'm totally neurotic.

The truth is, Laney's hormones have been going wild since she was ten.

The truth is...

The truth was I could barely afford that either.

The truth was, we'd only met a few times.

The underage guy.

The Village Voice had more ads looking for threesomes...

The way she had decided all men were assholes.

The woman who I think I love just called and asked me back

The women who wrote that book wrote it because they couldn't get laid...

Then Charlotte did the unthinkable.

Then he leaves me money.

Then he married this girl who doesn't like me.

Then he'll wonder why you don't...

Then I realized no one had told her about the end of love in Manhattan.

Then I thought, how great!

Then I'm happy for you.

Then it was just the two of us.

Then maybe this is for real?

Then Miranda and I would go for eggs

Then something wonderful happened.

Then stop.

Then there are the other times.

Then there's that hell on Earth...

Then we went to this Chinese restaurant, and you'll never guess who I ran into.

Then what else is going on?

Then what's really going on here? Is it younger men feel safer?

Then, just when she thought her evening couldn't get any worse...

There are 1.3 million single men in New York...

There are four bedrooms upstairs. Do you have any children?

There are maybe tens of thousands of women like this in the city.

There are no available men in their thirties in New York.

There are no frozen eggs in my freezer.

There are people starving out there and you're fasting.

There are two types of guys that fall for beautiful women.

There he was, right in the middle of my drink thing...

There he was...

There is.

There it was in Bic blue... twenty something Sam's phone number.

There it wasn't...

There they are.

There they are.

There they were, my new neighbors...

There was only one thing to do.

There wasn't any pressure.

There we were, the '90s version of matinee ladies.

There were so many questions I wanted him to answer, but would not ask.

There would be none of that messy emotional attachment.

There you are.

There you are. How are you?

There's a certain camp that believes whoever holds the dick holds the power.

There's a moment in every relationship where romance gives way to reality.

There's a woman in there breast feeding a child who can chew steak.

There's cereal at my place.

There's not much of a chance of running into anybody I know.

There's not one woman in New York who hasn't turned down 10 wonderful guys...

There's nothing like raising the subject of models among four single women...

There's nothing sinful about sex.

There's nothing wrong.

There's only gonna be one stop. Thanks.

There's only one thing left to do.

Therefore, getting money for sex is simply an exchange of power.

These are outstanding. So much life.

These guys in their twenties, they are up for anything.

They all looked so chic and glamorous.

They all think the same, dress the same...

They are just as self centered and unappreciative as the good looking ones.

They become married, and we become the enemy.

They decided to pick a time to bump into each other on purpose.

They give great head and know a lot about wine.

They had a good laugh and decided to stay and play ball.

They had both loved to cook, and shopping was a Saturday morning ritual.

They have them. They just don't need to use them.

They have this distant, sexy look.

They just want us figured out.

They keep me from getting work done, they make me fuck up my life.

They know who they are and what they want, and I like that.

They liked each other immediately.

They make me ride in front with the driver, who's the original Chris...

They met one evening, in typical New York fashion...

They met the day after I dropped off the edge of the earth.

They remind me of how desperate I used to be.

They remind me of my mom.

They say a picture is worth a thousand words...

They say the average 33 year old woman has sex 3.5 times a week.

They seemed to meet everywhere.

They started out casual... a brunch here, a concert there.

They stopped making martinis, so I got us two rum and Cokes. Is that okay?

They told me to do that. And now they want to talk to you.

They told Miranda that Nick had this thing for models.

They travel. They pay taxes.

They valued romance.

They went back to his place and began the classic dating ritual...

They were fun, smart...

They wouldn't know a good book if it bit them in the ass.

They'd come to dinner...

They'll spend $400 on a pair of Manolo Blahnik strappy sandals.

They're a step beyond womanizers...

They're beautiful things. And that's what my life's about.

They're definitely not porcini.

They're inseparable. They do everything together.

They're stupid and lazy and should be shot on sight.

They're very powerful.

They've been officially dating since retinitis pigmentosis.

Things were great except for one thing.

Things were swinging into high gear...

Think about really good foreplay.

Thirty years from now, what do you think the chances are...

This affair was the most exciting thing that had happened to him...

This could easily go for a hundred grand.

This darling French bistro that I am telling you...

This felt so good, I'd do anything to keep this high.

This is a prewar 6. Notice the classic lines.

This is a watershed relationship moment I'm never gonna be able to erase.

This is at once so sad...

This is Carrie Bradshaw.

This is humiliating.

This is my friend Patience, and this is her husband Peter.

This is my life partner Lou.

This is my real art...

This is not a bad idea at all.

This is not the place to be frugal.

This is our friend Carrie.

This is such a surprise.

This is the C line. This is the best in the building.

This is the front.

This is the hottest chef in New York, Jon.

This is weird

This is why I hate baby showers. You always leave feeling depressed.

This isn't right. We're gonna pay for all this ourselves, all right?

This isn't the front. This is the back.

This isn't the Gap.

This little hole in the wall.

This one is really special.

This one.

This party is terrible. Who are you?

This party sucks.

This place is tired.

This should not be happening.

Those things make so many public appearances, they need a booking agent.

Those to explain the peculiar effects of infatuation.

Though Charlotte was determined to play hard to get...

Though, you do have a point.

Three months and one week.

Three months, I am going out of my mind.

Three prior serious relationships, none resulting in marriage.

Three times? Try three months.

Threesomes are huge right now. They're the blow job of the '90s.

Threesomes. Ever go to one?

Through unhealthy and dependent ways.,,

Till I knew exactly how I felt about the results, either way.

Till I know how l... what...

Tim was 42, a well liked and respected investment banker...

Tim, it's Elizabeth. That's an awfully long rain check.

Tits! Tits! Tits!

To 72nd and Madison.

To a party to introduce a new fragrance...

To another human being and you don't have to shave your legs as much.

To bend your ear about my work at the firm.

To calling it an early night, when...

To celebrate Charlotte's coup.

To check out what was new and hot on the art scene.

To crumble in their presence, exactly how powerful was beauty?

To get closer to Jack?

To get the lowdown on her love life with James.

To get them down on paper.

To go to Banana Republic and help twenty something Sam pick out a shirt.

To keep me from spending the night?

To let everyone know she was fabulous.

To live vicariously through my first official date with Mr. Big.

To make women who can get laid feel bad.

To meet him for a drink, blank.

To pure, universal God force.

To spice up an otherwise dull Tuesday night.

To supervise construction of a new hotel.

To tell you that I'm out of time.

To view his latest work.

Tofu or not tofu.

Tomorrow night. We're all going downtown to this club, Chaos.

Tonight I would ask Miranda.

Tonight, I needed more.

Took her to Lava, New York's restaurant du jour.

Trapped in the body of a lawyer.

Tricky, complicated...

True romance cannot exist without good sex.

True, we had never discussed exclusivity.

True, you're in front of the firing squad...

Trust me... this is not a story that makes men feel bad.

Trying to fit another outfit into an already overstuffed suitcase...

Turning the city into a virtual Model Country Safari...

Twelve thousand dollars.

Twenty minutes and three false alarms later, he was ready to call it quits.

Twenty something guys always know the really important "B" people.

Two bedrooms, prewar...

Two espressos and a tiramisu later...

Two hours and four chardonnays later, I was sleeping with the enemy.

Two hours later, we were bored.

Two ordinary joes were doing their own lonely late night thing.

Two weeks ago, I had my picture taken.

Two years ago, Laney did the most shocking thing of all.

Uh oh. Sounds like somebody just got their first vibrator.

Under 30 in the city.

Unfortunately, it was Jack who plunged first.

Unhappily married to a woman who designed modular office furniture.

Unicorn woman

Unless they are seriously thinking about marriage.

Unless you're planning to move those hands down, get them off me.

Until I know how to finish this sentence.

Until you get to that shower after sex phase.

Until your entire being is humming with that electric sexual energy.

Up here.

Up until that moment, I thought he only believed in the Yankees.

Upon those who deserve it least.

Us.

Use somebody random, somebody you meet in a bar or something.

Use tampons or have hair in places we shouldn't.

Valentino, Escada, Oscar de la Renta.

Venice is the most beautiful, the most romantic city in the world.

Veronica Lake, the year she made Sullivan's Travels.

Veronica Lake.

Very good. Let's move on to downward facing dog.

Very late that night, fueled by a massive quantity of champagne...

Very nice. Come on in. I'm watching the fight.

Very relaxed.

Very solidly built.

Wait a minute. I thought I ordered two eggs benedict and one spinach omelette.

Wait, don't even answer that question because, frankly, I don't care.

Wait, I didn't...

Wait, wait. Put them down a second.

Wait.

Wait. I think I recognize that voice.

Wait. I want to hold you.

Wait. Later.

Wait. Wait.

Wait. You haven't had sex yet?

Wait. You told Ruth about us?

Walk home...

Wall Street honcho seeks two horny gal pals...

Wanna fuck?

Wanna fuck?

Wanna go back to my place and see the Ross Blechner?

Was "bills, bills, bills."

Was an event as unfathomable...

Was for a singles mixer.

Was her collection of Chanel suits.

Was I the only one who remembered that Brooke once described this man...

Was it possible that I had become Mr. Big's secret sex girl?

Was it true?

Was Miranda right? Were we enemies?

Was one of those SoHo wonders who maintained a fabulous lifestyle...

Was Samantha right?

Was secret sex the ultimate form of intimacy...

Was someone looking for a view?

Was that you?

Was the bathroom clean?

Was the most sexually deviant act...

Was the time she lost all her luggage on a flight to Palm Beach.

Was the time she lost all her luggage on a flight to Palm Beach.

Was the world's biggest underwear model and Stanford's most important client...

Was to be found only in the cunt.

Was to move from one addiction to an even bigger one.

Watch.

Wave, darling. Wave.

We all know them, and we all agree they're great.

We already have a surrogate, but we need a topnotch egg.

We are at Balzac, and there is someone here I am dying for you to meet.

We aren't supposed to fart, douche...

We both sleep with men.

We both slept with him, and he is great in bed.

We call them our old married couple.

We can do better than that.

We can?

We can't do it again soon.

We could do that.

We did it with him on top, me on top, me on my side.

We did. It's amazing how much time has gone by.

We didn't think you'd make it.

We don't have time for diplomacy. Just tell me.

We go to the same Cabala class.

We got a live one, boys.

We got lost. We took the wrong bridge.

We have an unshakable bond. Whatever it takes, I'll keep this marriage together.

We have sex with other people, but we don't exchange fluids or phone numbers.

We just about to have dessert. Want to join us?

We looked like The Witches of Eastwick.

We love our nuts.

We really like each other. That's got to be stronger than a drug, right?

We really weren't that concerned.

We shopped for Deco cabinet handles for his armoire.

We should get together, not just say we're going to...

We should go. It's the right thing to do.

We should just admit that we live in a culture...

We think we're Carolyn Bessette. One day John John's out of the picture...

We used to go out.

We used to, but now we have sweet sex. Wild always beats out sweet.

We want different things. You obviously want to get married...

We were all dying to see which one had made the cut.

We were at the other one.

We were in different places and l...

We won't go there. Montgomery Clift.

We would all have preferred a nice celebratory conference call.

We would all have preferred a nice celebratory conference call.

We'd love it if you both could make it.

We'd love to.

We'll do it again soon.

We'll do our thing another time.

We'll get there. You just have to have a little faith.

We're all basically the same...

We're best friends. We make each other laugh.

We've been going out for months.

We've been going out for weeks, and we still haven't done it.

We've been riding the same elevator line for years...

We've been waiting for 45 minutes.

We've known each other for ten years but never had sex...

We've met him. He's perfect.

We've never done anything like this before.

Wearing my secret weapon skirt that really hugged my hips...

Welcome to the age of "un innocence."

Welcome.

Well, at the risk of sounding trite...

Well, cheese shop, I mean.

Well, do it immediately. It is fabulous.

Well, enjoy your dinner.

Well, for a few minutes anyway.

Well, get in, for Christ's sakes.

Well, go.

Well, gosh, I'm sorry.

Well, how can you just say that like that?

Well, I can't believe it.

Well, I don't know if you're going to be getting that lucky.

Well, I don't think of us as married so much as together.

Well, I enjoyed it.

Well, I guess you must find me beautiful.

Well, I hate rum and I hate Coke.

Well, I have an idea.

Well, I love jazz.

Well, I plan on getting a lot of blow jobs in the future...

Well, I think it's over.

Well, I think it's really important that you try.

Well, I think this might be it.

Well, I, for one, love my life.

Well, I'll be home later if you miss me.

Well, I'm discovering that...

Well, I'm gonna excuse myself.

Well, I'm not sure.

Well, I'm sure after tonight we won't be doing much of either.

Well, I'm working on a story about men who date models.

Well, if you're lucky.

Well, if you're not gonna hit on him, I will.

Well, in that case, absolutely.

Well, is that what she said?

Well, it was my pleasure.

Well, it was nice talking to you.

Well, it was. We had such a fantastic connection.

Well, it's just a private little thing...

Well, it's pretty obscure.

Well, it's weird, 'cause with the Rabbit it's like every time, boom!

Well, kind of used to go out.

Well, maybe just for a minute.

Well, my story is about a little girl...

Well, no.

Well, not yet, at least. Sit down.

Well, she's got these magic...

Well, sort of.

Well, sort of.

Well, Syd is. I'm not.

Well, thanks for clearing that up.

Well, thanks.

Well, there is something to be said for restraint.

Well, this is my work.

Well, three months is not normal for me.

Well, we won't tell anyone.

Well, what I want is to get laid. What I need is to get laid.

Well, who doesn't love children's books?

Well, yeah.

Well, you better get sure real quick.

Well, you can buy me dinner sometime and a CAT scan.

Well, you write every Sunday, so...

Well, your message said you weren't coming.

Well?

Well...

Well...

Well...

Well... Yeah, cute.

Went to a single guy's housewarming party.

Went to romantic restaurants...

Were Sean's friends cold war conscientious objectors...

Were the perfect antidote to Laney's House of Humiliation.

Were threesomes the new sexual frontier?

Were women in New York really giving up on love and throttling up on power?

West Broadway and Broom.

What a pervert.

What a pity.

What a relief! I had just escaped the "sex on the first date" curse.

What a relief.

What a tempting thought.

What about romance?

What about them?

What about this one?

What about you?

What about you? Are you seeing anyone?

What about you? You like being single?

What an amazing observation.

What are you afraid of? What are other people going to think?

What are you doing back here? You said to meet out front.

What are you doing down there?

What are you doing for lunch today?

What are you doing here? What is she doing here?

What are you doing later?

What are you getting so uptight about?

What are you going to do? You gonna tell Mr. Big?

What are you gonna do about sex?

What are you saying?

What are you saying? That you're just going to give up on love?

What are you talking about?

What are you talking about?

What are you talking about? I went to Smith.

What are you worried about?

What are you writing about this week?

What are your fantasies?

What are your feelings about donating one?

What did the perfect boyfriend ask?

What do I have to do to get to know her better?

What do I want from you?

What do you say to my place, 3:00?

What do you think about not seeing anyone else but each other?

What do you think your dream meant?

What do you think?

What do you think?

What do you think?

What do you want to be when you grow up?

What does that mean?

What happened?

What happened?

What I wanna know is...

What I'm hearing is you're still very upset...

What if he doesn't like her?

What if he never calls and three weeks from now...

What if I am?

What if you don't like him? What if he doesn't like you?

What if you spend five years with him and in the end you have nothing?

What if you've already slept with him?

What is going on with you two?

What is it about God and fashion that go so well together?

What is wrong with you? Why are you acting so nuts?

What is wrong?

What just happened? Where'd you go?

What makes Little Cathy special?

What makes you so sure you haven't? Wedding rings come off, you know.

What Mr. Big didn't realize was the past was sleeping right next to me.

What religion are you?

What Samantha needed now more than anything was a compliment from anyone.

What was happening to me? I used to get a secret rush...

What was that all about the other night?

What was that?

What women really want is Alec Baldwin.

What, are you rating churches? Is there a Zagat guide for that?

What, like in those old religious movies? A voice from above?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What? Are you kiddin'? You're serious?

What? Do you think I'm a masochist?

What? He's not here because I slept with him on the first date?

What? Leave him before he leaves me?

What's cute compared to supermodel?

What's cuter than that?

What's going on? Why are you crying?

What's really going on here is sex.

What's that smile about?

What's that supposed to mean?

What's the big deal? In 50 years, men are gonna be obsolete anyway.

What's the problem?

Whatever happened to giving a nice pen?

When a show is good, word gets around.

When Charlotte discovered that Kevin had tucked his libido away...

When did all the men get together and decide...

When did you get so obsessed with being perfect?

When have I ever given you a birthday present or a Christmas present?

When have you ever been on a tenth date?

When I blow him, it's like...

When I come out, I'd kind of like it if you weren't here.

When I realized that I no longer had the energy to be completely superficial.

When I was a girl, I left my baby doll in the rain for four days.

When I was little, I took a rubber band and put it around my dog's snout.

When I was senior vice president, 212 people reported to me daily.

When I'm through with him, he'll be Gracie Mansion.

When life gets this confusing, sometimes there's only one thing to do...

When relationships had gotten so complicated.

When Sean told us you and he were dating, we were so thrilled.

When she hadn't heard from him for two weeks, she called.

When someone gets married, all bets are off.

When that's under control, then I can concentrate on my personal life.

When we get to St. Barts, you can buy me one big margarita.

When will I get married?

When women get married, they forget who they are.

When you lay like that...

When you're a young guy in your 20s, women are controlling the relationship.

When?

Whenever she lights up, she can go anywhere in the whole wide world.

Whenever you feel like it. If I'm alone, I'm all yours.

Where all that sexual energy is coursing through your body...

Where are you goin', doll? I got what you want.

Where better to find modelizers in their natural habitat than a fashion show?

Where is it?

Where is it? I wanna see the Ross Blechner.

Where men can pet the creatures in their natural habitat.

Where men take women they don't want to be seen with.

Where she kept reminders of all the things she hoped for in life...

Where the hell is he?

Where the owner's son practically always sends over...

Where the shame of this won't follow me.

Where we can toast you where the bus goes by.

Where you feel like you know nothing about the person...

Where you goin' so fast? I got what you want, what you need.

Where, somewhere like New Jersey, where we might actually get seated?

Where's the line between professional girlfriend...

Whether he's not meeting me as a date or as a friend.

Which had overnight become the only restaurant that mattered.

Which one?

Which possibly means I have Alzheimer's...

Which presented a certain conundrum.

Which were somewhat mollified when they told me I could keep the dress.

Which will make him realize he does, and then it's a whole new ball game.

While at home, all the English I seemed to encounter...

While I decided to investigate this theory I had...

While I was talking to you and I didn't even realize it.

While Miranda cursed her heterosexuality...

While Miranda misjudged the intensity of Skipper's feelings...

While Samantha was doing everything in her power to remake the Turtle...

While the three of us went in search of furrier companionship.

Who all behave like they own the sidewalk.

Who am I to know what's normal?

Who are dating models?

Who cares about age, crossword puzzles...

Who cares?

Who doesn't understand a single word.

Who else would keep you in expensive shoes and encourage you to cheat?

Who had to leave early in the morning to catch a flight to D.C. For a conference.

Who he felt he could just be with.

Who he was trying to forget as quickly as possible.

Who here is your type?

Who in most cities are safely confined to billboards and magazines...

Who is it?

Who is this Amalita Amalfi character, anyway?

Who knows whether it was her vodka or her vibe...

Who live in the city and still have great careers and stuff.

Who lived in a brownstone between Central Park West and Columbus.

Who lived with her mother in Paris.

Who made about two million a year.

Who said anything about talking?

Who said the theater was dead.

Who still believed in the one on one relationship.

Who think that life is a Jacqueline Susann novel?

Who tries to fix up their friends.

Who wants to see my tits?

Who was never a believer in relationships...

Who was still the best sex I ever had in my life.

Who was that self important bitch?

Who will sleep with just about anything in a skirt.

Who would be sure that I was the one.

Who would share your hopes and your fears and your dreams...

Who?

Who?

Who's the mystery woman?

Whoever heard of Mrs. Up The Butt? No, no, no.

Whoever this is, I can't talk. I'm late for a drink thing.

Whose marriage she had very accurately predicted.

Whose name I wanted to shout from the rooftops.

Why are there so many great unmarried women...

Why are you crying?

Why did you call me back anyway?

Why didn't he come?

Why didn't you call?

Why didn't you call?

Why didn't you introduce him to anybody?

Why do people get married if they're not in love?

Why does he have to have a small dick?

Why don't the two of you just spend a night together...

Why don't these women just marry a fat guy?

Why don't they just marry a big, fat tub of lard?

Why don't you call her?

Why don't you come upstairs, just for a minute?

Why don't you just come down here and be your fabulous self?

Why don't you quick drop this?

Why don't you show him more of this Carrie? She's great.

Why don't you two have a guy's night.

Why fuck the girl in the skirt...

Why is it in a city of ten million men...

Why is it that putting a tie around a man's neck...

Why not?

Why not?

Why not? An angel like you?

Why?

Why?

Why?

Why? What have you heard?

Why? Why?

Wild Laney is having a baby shower. You pull over.

Wild. I like it.

Will I ever get married?

Will I get to see you sometime?

Will keep this marriage together, then I am prepared to join you...

Will you at least lick my balls?

Will you go home with me tonight?

Will you lighten up? It's a Presbyterian church, not a Catholic one.

Will you relax? I don't have a shred of feeling left.

Wiped out!

With $1,000 in cash.

With a billboard in Times Square.

With a five year old daughter, Beatrice...

With a little help from her friends, Charlotte decided...

With an apartment overlooking the Natural History Museum.

With breath like that, you're gonna live a very long life alone.

With doctors, real estate, men.

With great success in your future, but I do not see marriage.

With him, I could do it every hour on the hour.

With him...

With my hooker money still burning a hole in my pocket...

With my Walkman, light up a joint...

With people we're ashamed to introduce to our friends?

With smoked salmon and sour cream when...

With the same enthusiasm she once reserved..

With who?

With your perfect apartment and your perfect pay per view fight.

Women can use their sexuality to get ahead whenever possible...

Women fall into one of two categories:

Women have the right to use every means at their disposal to achieve power.

Women having sex like men thing?

Women in their thirties are just so grateful.

Wonderful.

Would find its way into Thomas John Anderson's...

Would have to be amended to include a special set of rules...

Would I be any good?

Would I somehow manage to stay me?

Would you care to join us?

Would you consider posing for me sometime?

Would you do a threesome with me?

Would you knock it the fuck off? I'm trying to watch this fight.

Would you like to go for a coffee sometime?

Would you really want me to do something I didn't wanna do?

Wow! A guy who doesn't want to get married! Film at 11:00!

Wow! You changed your hair.

Wow.

Wow. That's great.

Wow. What an honor

Wow. What are you doin' here?

Wow. What's wrong with you?

Wow. When did you two...

Writing does not pay well?

X Files fanatic twosome...

Yeah, 8:00's fine.

Yeah, but no man ever did that. I'm scared. What am I gonna do?

Yeah, but then you said that...

Yeah, but...

Yeah, except men in this city fail on both counts.

Yeah, fuck 'em.

Yeah, I know. I've become one of those women we hate.

Yeah, I think she is so sexy and smart and...

Yeah, I think so.

Yeah, it was totally hot.

Yeah, me too.

Yeah, most of the time.

Yeah, Nick. And eat without purging.

Yeah, of course we are. Why wouldn't we be?

Yeah, right.

Yeah, she caught me on the way to the bathroom.

Yeah, she's something else.

Yeah, that's exactly what it is, crazy.

Yeah, the whole night.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. Do you feel your cock where it wants to be every night?

Yeah. I finally ask her to join me in public; she turns me down.

Yeah. I mean, what do you do for work?

Yeah. I thought I told you.

Yeah. I'm not gay.

Yeah. Right. Sure. I guess.

Yeah. Well, they are things.

Yeah. You are.

Yeah. You would say that. You're a publicist.

Yep.

Yep.

Yes, actually. I think it's quite interesting.

Yes, I do.

Yes, I have a column in The Star.

Yes, I'm happy.

Yes, please.

Yes, please. Thank you very much.

Yes, Samantha, Miranda and I were all recreational users...

Yes, you have. I can't talk now. I'll call you later. Okay?

Yes, you must bring your little laptop and write all about it.

Yes?

Yes?

Yes?

Yes.

Yes.

Yes. Congratulations.

Yes. It is perfect for that.

Yes. When you sleep with a man on the first date...

Yesterday, today and tomorrow.

Yet I never see you.

You all excited for the big vacation?

You always get up and shower right after we're done.

You always see the one you don't want and never see the one you...

You are crazy, you know that?

You are cursed.

You are not going to believe the evening I've had.

You are outrageous. I love it.

You are such a turn on, and you have no idea.

You be black or hispanic, I'll be on time.

You better be careful. I could get used to this.

You bitch!

You both got excited, and you went for it. Stop blaming yourself.

You bought a pregnant woman a bottle of Scotch?

You bring me back to that restaurant...

You call them things?

You can bang your head against the wall and try and find a relationship...

You can bang your head against the wall and try and find a relationship...

You can get anything.

You can join me there first.

You can still become a very interesting person.

You can't bring around any more of these so called models.

You can't sleep with him on the first date.

You could not drag me to that thing if you put a grappling hook in my mouth.

You could smell my desperation, right?

You could still enjoy sex with a man and the Rabbit.

You did?

You didn't seem fine.

You don't even need them to have sex with anymore...

You don't have any coffee...

You don't have to lose yourself to have a kid.

You don't have to tell your mother or the whole world, just...

You drag me out here at 3:00 a.m. To ask me if I wanna stand still with you?

You drop this big bomb, and you don't give me any details.

You farted. You're human.

You feel like getting some Szechuan?

You feel like you're being devoured by women.

You finally understand the kind of relationship I want...

You get over here.

You get that way with every guy that you're with?

You give me a call and we'll sue the hell out of him.

You got it.

You got what I want? You got what I need?

You gotta admit, you met some nice people.

You gotta be able to roll into a place, walk up to the hottest thing there.

You guys have cleaned me out.

You had a good time. Okay?

You had to hand it to Miranda. She was determined.

You hate giving blow jobs?

You have a beautiful way with light.

You have a little bit of sauce on the lip...

You have a lot of nerve coming in here. You're the one who made me get it.

You have fun.

You have me in a niche. Certain events. Certain restaurants. Certain people.

You have no new messages in your mailbox.

You have the cutest little wrinkles in your neck.

You have to at least try one of the glazed.

You hid the Rabbit behind a stuffed rabbit? That is so you.

You just had to know her.

You just wanna be with the one that makes you laugh.

You kidding? Check out the ex.

You know Derek takes up like, a thousand percent of my time.

You know how I feel about that?

You know it's not your style, but it's right there so you try it on anyway.

You know the greatest thing about writing a successful book?

You know what we did today?

You know what you are? You're a whore

You know what? I have to pee.

You know who wants to get married? Men who miss their mommies.

You know, came.

You know, I didn't tell you I was married because it was a long time ago.

You know, I missed you today.

You know, I think I'm at that table over there.

You know, I was really pissed off the way you left the other day.

You know, I'm not feeling very well.

You know, most guys, when they meet a girl...

You know, pinch a few pennies.

You know, talk, cry, shoot bear.

You know, that salmon is really good.

You know, they have sex...

You know, we need to go someplace absolutely fabulous...

You know, you really are a nice, sweet guy, but...

You know?

You know? See if it fit.

You know? The traditional American kind. Dinner and a movie.

You know...

You know...

You know...

You know... You know what?

You like it because she gets to sleep for 100 years, and doesn't age.

You look great.

You look great.

You look great.

You look so beautiful when you sleep.

You look...

You looked great.

You mean besides going out every night?

You mean it's the kind of place...

You mean like a hooker?

You mean like what he really meant was, "I've been a complete idiot.

You mind if we just call it a night? Okay?

You must be Charlotte.

You need all the girl support you can get, and I'm late for drinks with Big.

You really have that certain je ne sais quoi, don't you?

You say that like I'm the antichrist or something.

You say that, but you haven't met "The Rabbit."

You see that buddy over there?

You see that guy? He's the next Donald Trump...

You see those doors? That's the front. You were waiting at the street entrance.

You should write about me. My life is so fucked up right now.

You should. You paid enough for it.

You show up at church after I asked you not to.

You sound like my kind of guy.

You start thinking you're hot, then he brings up the threesome thing.

You tell me you guys had a three way. Yes, I asked.

You think about it, and give us a call.

You think you should be dating.

You thought you knew everything about.

You two used to go out? That's so funny.

You wanna find out?

You wanna go home? Yeah, yeah.

You wanna see something?

You want a private tour?

You want me to go over there...

You want to go to church?

You want to go to the Caribbean next week.

You want to watch a movie?

You want to write a children's book about smoking?

You were married?

You were on a date with a modelizer...

You won't believe what Carlo bought me this afternoon at Van Cleef & Arpels.

You won't come out and meet my friends.

You would like another bottle of wine?

You wouldn't commit to a nice guy given the option?

You, a couple with class

You, coffee. Me, bathroom.

You, me and another woman.

You? Never.

You'd be mad not to go.

You'd fall off the edge of the earth?

You'll get used to it.

You'll never be married.

You'll never believe it, but...

You're a freak.

You're a star! You're a star!

You're a strong, independent woman...

You're all freaked out about three times. I'm talking three months.

You're amazing.

You're an hour early.

You're breaking up with me while you're still inside of me?

You're crazy!

You're free to go work with the lepers now.

You're giving off this sexual energy all the time.

You're gonna be a star. Have I told you that enough?

You're here, you have an hour. Let's have a drink.

You're kidding, right?

You're like the Harvard Law Lorena Bobbitt.

You're looking at me while you're saying that?

You're looking good, baby. Good enough to eat.

You're next. Bill's got some great single friends.

You're not dating him?

You're quite the storyteller.

You're right.

You're right.

You're right. Not all.

You're telling me...

You've been having sex.

You've been so patient with me.

You've got everything I'm looking for...

You've got to be kidding.

You've never been in love.

You've never been to New York?

Your ex wife's breasts, your ex wife's lips...

Your ex wife's long legs.

Your friend Barkley, he's really been coming on to me.

Your friend Carrie tell you about that?

Your friend invited me up. I know it was wrong.

Your friend is gorgeous.

Your friend never called like she promised.

Your nose.

Your sexual energy's just starting to awaken.

Yup.

Yup. I'm determined to make partner in this firm...

Yvette?

1.8 million single women.

2:00 a.m. And I already had a new man in my life.

'Morning. Good morning.

"Faith"? Yeah. Look.

A cult? What are you talking about? Listen.

A hundred years. It never goes down, does it?

About what? Well, last night...

Actually, I hardly miss it. How long has it been?

Actually, I was kidding. I'm not! Think about it.

All right, let's get out of here. Let me just pay for my Cap'n Crunch.

All right. I like him.

And his friend Gilles. Hello.

And I think I enjoyed it. That's great.

And sometimes I get so distracted. What's distracting you now?

And that's a good thing. What's that supposed to mean?

And then I was a fool in divorce court. Now you're just a fool.

And then we're picking up Samantha. Oh, Carrie, no.

And you can invite Mr. Big. No. I don't think so.

And you have to be Samantha. Yeah. Where's the bar?

And? And we're no longer having sex.

Any sex, period. Don't let him pressure you into it.

Any thoughts? Only that they're very lucky.

Anything else? That's it.

Are you having fun? Yes, but not as much fun as Miranda.

Are you in bed with someone? No. Are you?

Are you leaving so early? I've got a plane.

Are you listening to me? Yeah.

Are you sure you're okay? I'm fine.

Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Perfect!

Babies. I'll probably end up with five.

Barney's. I was kidding.

Be right back. Night after night, the same thing.

Before what? Prozac.

Bottoms up. Wait a second.

But he's not with her anymore. Because they stopped having wild sex.

But I think it depends on my hair. Yeah.

But if you... I shaved my Barbie's head.

But thanks. Martinis, ladies.

But what if he wants me to, you know. Hold his brush?

But you don't have relationships. Which is why I have great sex.

But you're not like that. Well, aren't you?

Bye. All right. Bye.

Bye. Bye bye.

Bye. Excuse me.

Caftan? Oh, yes, with orchid leis.

Can I have a cigarette? Sure.

Can I quote you? Don't be so judgmental.

Can I talk to you for a second? Sure.

Can you get away? Yeah, but I can't afford it.

Can you talk to him about it? No.

Carrie. Hey, hi.

Charming? This I gotta hear.

Cheers. I didn't want to admit she was right.

Chip. Chip.

Coffee. I need coffee. It's in the kitchen.

Come on. I'd do it with you guys.

Come on. Not tonight

Come on. It's our first date. She's not gonna have sex.

Concentrate. Quiet your insides. Now he tells me.

Congratulations. Where are you registered?

Could we take a rain check? Of course.

Darling, you look fantastic. I can't let you do this.

Dave? I'd have to go with Sophia Loren.

Did he call? Nope.

Did she tell you that we made out? No

Do you know him? Did I know him?

Do you see him? Right over there.

Do you want to get out of here? Sure.

Doesn't she know who we are? Who are we?

Don't knock it till you've tried it. I had a threesome once, I think.

Don't mention it. I just... I'm not even sure...

Don't spread that around. Before James...

Don't you live in the city? I'm a citizen of the world.

Don't you think it's lovely? Mother, this is my friend Carrie.

Drew the sex god. Right. Afterwards?

Egg shell? Yes.

Everything good? Yeah. Everything's dandy.

Exactly. Could be.

Except men think they're possible. Yeah.

Excuse me? I don't see it.

Excuse me? You heard me.

Excuse me? You know who I'm talking about.

Fuck! Two words: Smart pussy.

Give me a 20. You must be joking.

Give me the fucking candy. Hey, snapping over Gummy Bears...

Go, go. Thank you.

God, you look gorgeous. Thanks.

Good morning, babe. Good morning.

Good morning. Hey.

Good morning. Morning.

Good night. Bye! Have fun!

Good night. Good night.

Good seeing you. Bye. Bye bye. Cheers.

Good to see you. Good to see you again.

Good to see you. You remember Phyllis.

Guess he took our ultimatum seriously. Deanne.

Has she even heard of me? She doesn't need to meet...

Have you ever done that? It's too early to remember.

Have you got that, Al? Yes, sir.

He became predictable. How predictable.

He never used the "D" word. Well, "thing" is good.

He was gay. Oh.

He's gonna ask you to marry him. He is not.

Hello, Jared. That was Jared.

Hello? Carrie, it's Charlotte.

Hello? Carrie, it's Stanford.

Hello? Carrie, you bitch! What are you doing?

Hello? Do you miss me yet?

Hello? Hey, Carrie, it's Charlotte.

Hello? Hi.

Hello? It's Laney.

Hello? Listen. I have a question.

Hello. How could you?

Hello. This is Ruth Scheer, Ken's wife.

Hey, Carrie. Barkley, how are you?

Hey, sweetie. Hey.

Hey, you made it. Hey, Jared.

Hey. Hey. I'm sorry. I should go.

Hi, Stanford. Derek?

Hi. Love your column. Never miss it. Wow. Thanks.

Hi. Nice to meet you finally. You too.

Hi. You were great in the show. Thank you.

Him on his side? Oh, God, yes.

His wife won't give him a blow job. Should that make me feel better?

Honey? Bing Crosby.

How good a friend was she? What's the difference?

How long are you here for? Just a couple of days. On business.

How small? Too small.

How'd it feel? Weird.

How's your dinner? It's questionable.

Huge mistake. You think?

I am so fucked. What's wrong?

I can go home. It's no big deal. No. Stay. It's 6:00 A.M.

I can just get dressed. Relax.

I can't do this. Of course you can.

I can't just ignore it, can I? Yes. No!

I didn't know what to do or say. Great!

I didn't mean... Are you okay? She met someone in gym class.

I do have another fantasy. What's that?

I fold. What if you sense that someone...

I found your number in his drawer. Hang on.

I got to cancel on the ballet tonight. Why?

I got what you need. You talking to me?

I hate my thighs. Oh, come on.

I hate my thighs. Pass the chicken.

I hate those. Okay, yes, I have.

I have to interview someone. About what?

I knew we'd get back together. You did?

I know. She told me at lunch. I know. She told me she told you.

I mean, "thing" comes before date. Let's hope so.

I missed you guys. Us?

I need is to get laid. Take it easy, lady. I'm married.

I only give head to get head. Me too.

I really do. You're much too modest.

I really like him. I thought you loved him.

I see you found us. Big couch.

I shouldn't be embarrassed? No. You look fabulous.

I take her to church every Sunday. Really?

I think I broke my vagina. Sorry. Am I pulling too hard?

I think it's sweet. All religions are sweet...

I thought your name was Charlotte. No, it's not my name.

I was once ten days late. Really? Were you having sex?

I'd love to. I'll call you at work.

I'll be right back. Stay here a second.

I'll be right... Yeah.

I'll buy two. I'm in for three.

I'll get you a drink. Cosmopolitan. Thanks.

I'll put your names at the door. Thanks.

I'm back. I don't know who you are...

I'm getting ready to go to sleep. Why don't you come and join us?

I'm going home. Can I come?

I'm gonna go in. Okay.

I'm in love. What?

I'm not doing this here. Fine.

I'm only kidding. But obviously this is what he's into.

I'm sorry I'm late. It's about time.

I'm sorry? Nothing.

I've just been... Fucking your brains out?

I've never done a threesome. Because you have relationships.

Is he a good kisser? Who the fuck cares?

Is he gay? He denies it.

Is he gay? He denies it.

Is he still doing that? It's amazing he has any skin left.

Is she a cousin? No.

Is she hot? Jack!

Is she seeing anybody? Wide open.

Is this you and Madonna? Yeah.

Isn't that funny? That's my office.

It actually worked until... Hey, gorgeous!

It depends. How much do you like him? A lot.

It is? Absolutely.

It never goes out of style. Never.

It was great to see you guys. Great meeting you.

It's a baby shower. No, it's a cult.

It's a lovely church. Yes, isn't it?

It's biological destiny. Do you really want to say that?

It's good. It's made by monks.

It's nice. I'm so happy for you.

It's not the end of the world. It's really small.

It's not the fucking fart. I know it's not the fucking fart.

It's official. He's late. Who?

It's okay to have hurt feelings. And you always handle those so well.

It's so unique, isn't it? It's so my name!

It's you. I've been looking all over for you.

Jack thinks I'm sexy. He's buttering you up.

Just cat food? Yes, just cat food.

Ken! Sam!

Kind of like a 7 Eleven? Come on.

Lemonade and cookies? Thank you.

Let's go. Nice to meet you.

Listen, I have some not great news. I'm back with Mr. Big?

Look at you! You're huge! I know.

Look at you. I was a waiter at TGIF.

Look who's here. Hey, you two! What a small world!

Look, it's still... Hard.

Loser. Leper.

Lyme disease? That's another good one.

Maybe my friend Miranda. When?

Maybe they're not that close. Don't lie. You're in a church.

Maybe too comfortable. What do you mean?

Maybe we better sit down. Fuck no! Where's the bar?

Maybe. I have no doubt.

Meaning? Interesting dress.

Mike Singer out on a date. The whole world's in love

Miranda? Hi.

Miranda? Martini.

Montgomery Clift. Marilyn Monroe.

My husband heard it somewhere else. Really? Where? I didn't tell him.

Naked. There it was...

Never mind. What, think I'll ever go off it?

Nice to meet you. Carrie writes "Sex And The City."

Nice to meet you. You too.

No harm done. Thank you, sir.

No offense. I don't want to be one of them either.

No wonder we're not having sex. You're insane!

No, God, no. Yes.

No, thank you. Really? You can't find them anywhere.

No, thanks. Excuse me.

No. Good. Why'd you break up?

No. Yes.

No. I'm in love with you. No, no, no.

Not at all. Question.

Not too naked? Just naked enough.

Now you're just being cruel. No.

Number one, he's very handsome. There ya go.

Obsessed with models. Correct.

Oh, God. I'd relive my hell all over again.

Oh, sweetie, I gotta go. Yeah?

Okay, where is it? What are you talking about?

Only models? Only models.

Or interesting. I was about to rescue Skipper...

Park Avenue Presbyterian. It's one of the best on the East Side.

Please don't laugh. What?

Promise. I promise.

Prozac. Yeah. I used to be such a mess.

Really? Trappist monks.

Really? Yeah.

Really? Yeah.

Right now, in front of you? I can handle it.

right out the window. That's right!

Right. Take Kevin and I, for example.

Sam, this is my wife Ruth. Hi.

See you in there. Where did Skipper go?

Seriously, what did you get her? Seriously. They're pastel.

Seriously? Grandmother's worn that for 40 years.

She doesn't know you're gay? She doesn't believe in gay.

She has magic cigarettes? Yes.

She is? Yeah.

She told me one day over coffee. I don't understand.

She told you? She told me.

She used to be a friend of mine. Good morning.

She's a doll. You'll love her. Hey, there, stranger.

She's just gonna look like sex. That's right. I'm just the trailer.

Sit down. I can't. This outfit works if I stand.

Size isn't everything. Three inches?

Skipper. I have this theory...

So are his friends cute? Don't know. I haven't met them yet.

So how big was it? Fresh pepper?

So I totally dig your friend Miranda. That's great.

So obviously not a model. In a good way!

So when I feel like it, I'll call you. Yeah, please.

So you'll be there? I'll do my best.

So you've been using it! Yes.

So, never been married? Once. Long time ago.

So, what's with the showers? What do you mean?

So, where we goin' now? Listen, Skippy...

Somebody get me a drink! You think that's a good idea?

Sophia Loren. Montgomery Clift.

Sorry. The evidence was mounting.

Still am. I love Miss Saigon.

Stop it. Have a light?

Surprise. Yeah.

Susan... Hello.

Sweetheart, you are so cute. Cute doesn't cut it in this town.

Thanks for the ride. Anytime.

Thanks. I wish I could write.

That can't be good. Don't listen to her.

That was a great meal. Yeah, it was.

That was quite a play, ladies. It's all about teamwork, Charles.

That was... Totally awesome.

That won't be necessary. Oh, my God! I don't believe it!

That would be funny, wouldn't it? Yeah.

That'll do. Would you like some fresh pepper?

That's a good line. I'm getting together...

That's fantastic. No. It's too quick.

That's just bad behavior. You honestly like it?

That's not all. L... What?

That's one way to say no. It's not like I haven't tried.

That's romantic. No.

That's sick. No, no, no. Believe me...

That's the issue. No smoking in cab.

That's when you dump them. Ladies, are we really that cynical?

The guest star? Yeah.

The man is scum. Good.

The pinch hitter. Exactly.

The truth? When have I ever wanted that?

Then move your mat away. Not now. I did it in front of Big.

There are ways to work around this. I don't want to.

They should make them wear a sign. Single people in New York...

They're so scattered and unfocused. We're not dating.

They're too old for you. I like older women.

Third date. Too soon.

This apartment is amazing. I've been planning it for years.

This is for you. Thank you.

Three years ago? Three years. I can live with that.

Tonight will work. I'll call Charlotte and Samantha...

Too scary. I mean, he's a rational...

Wait. Are we married? Yeah.

Wait. Don't you want some coffee? Oh, gosh.

We come together... We're out of here.

We could drive that to Connecticut. I'm putting my name on that card.

We kissed. Just kissed?

We should get together more often. Mm hmm.

We'd better let you get dressed. I am dressed.

We'll pay. Great seeing you.

We'll see you after the show. Bye.

We're leaving. Oh, God.

We're not in the greatest place. What happened?

We've all been there. That's for sure.

Well, we adore him. He's very smart.

Well, you look good, though. So do you.

Well... Hard?

What am I gonna do? How is he with his tongue?

What are you doing here? I'm with... I'll tell you later.

What are you doing here? Research.

What are you doing here? What I do best... partying!

What are you talking about? You won't introduce me to your friends.

What did I miss? Nothing.

What did I say? Never mind.

What did you get her? Condoms.

What do you mean, he couldn't make it? I don't know. It was a work thing.

What do you think? Fabulous.

What do you think? What? Ow!

What is there, a cash prize? Yeah.

What was the blow job of the '80s? Anal sex.

What year was it painted again? '89.

What? God.

What? I don't see marriage.

What? It's just a habit I have.

What? Lou and I want to have a child.

What? Your crossword puzzle.

What? What the hell happened to you? His name is Jared.

What's all this? I'm painting.

What's going on? She stole my baby name.

What's her name? Her name was Libby Biyalick.

When did you become such a Victorian? The Victorians were onto something.

When did you get to town? Just yesterday.

Where are we going? Oh, hell.

Where are you off to? Samantha's having one of her parties.

Where can I drop you? 72nd Street and Third Avenue.

Where do you write these stories? My cute stories?

Where? Look at him.

Where? Right there.

Where's Mr. Big? He couldn't make it.

Where's... Don't ask.

While another part... Hi.

Who is it? Me.

Who is this? How have you been?

Who is this? It's Ken.

Who was that? Just some guy I skied with in Aspen.

Whore. Exactly!

Why did you get married? I was a fool in love.

Why didn't you tell me? Next time. I promise, all right?

Why don't we have coffee? I can't. I'm on deadline...

Why don't we talk about this Saturday? Sure, sure, sure.

Why is that? I don't know.

Why? Is it me? No, you're great.

Why? Is she married? No.

Wow, he looks great! Doesn't he?

Wow, that's great. Have you read it?

Yeah! Who needs it?

Yeah? I had a wonderful time.

Yeah. Gummy Bear, please.

Yeah. I'm gonna get us a soda.

Yeah. Nope.

Yeah. Alex. What about the window washer?

You could use a little back door. I'm not a hole.

You did? Yeah.

You didn't tell me why you broke up. I cheated on her.

You don't have any coffee filters. I'll make that. That's all right.

You don't want to go there. Why not?

You going to the party afterwards? I don't know.

You gotta show no fear. Things?

You have? Totally.

You know him? No.

You know this was a fix up, right? Oh, please.

You know... Pussy?

You mean with dildos? No, I mean without feeling.

You okay? Yeah.

You really do want it all. I don't know. Maybe nobody gets it all.

You should call her. I did, like a hundred times.

You should come and bring your friends. Sounds like fun.

You should join us. Absolutely!

You think I'm luminous? Totally.

You too. Good night.

You two know each other? Sure.

You two know each other. Well, kind of.

You wanna come home with me? Sure, if it's quiet.

You want to spend the night? The night? The whole night?

You were saying? Look.

You were? Yeah.

You work at Vogue? Designer relations.

You're forgetting The Last Seduction. You're obsessed with that movie.

You're going to Chaos? Oh. Yeah.

You're going to the West Side, right? Right. West Fourth and Bank, please.

You're hard. I know.

You're not even pregnant. That's not the point!

You're not going anywhere without me. Carrie.

You're scaring me. Don't scare her.

You're still hard. It'll go down.

You're the same person. That's enough.

You've gone up. Yes...

'cause that's what they do all the time.

'Night.

"Ace of wands." Prosperity.

"Blocks are connection to our inner life...

"Dating a few months until somebody better comes along" a lot...

"Get out! You're too old for this."

"give it to me" and "go home."

"He's sweet, he's fun, and I think he likes me.

"I want to get married."

"L" becomes "we." "We" loved the movie.

"My friend Carrie"?

"Nine of cups." Strength and independence.

"Our addictions and attachments...

"Thanks for the beautiful day."

"The Bone" is like the human equivalent of the sable coat.

"The Hanged Man." A new awakening.

"Time frame"?

"Was I next?"

"We've been seeing each other for a couple of weeks.

"We" hate that restaurant.

$92?

62nd and Madison? We're picking up Miranda.