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Home > It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia...
Warning: This soundboard may contain objectionable content, and is Not Safe For Work (NSFW)
A beef and beer? It's been years. Mm hmm.
A lot.
A strong man, a brave man.
A turtle's dream.
A well placed pen can have quite an effect on a man like him
Act like you belong here.
Actually, it was your friends over at the other table.
Ah, come on.
Ah, hold still, Charlie you're flickering.
Ah, look at this
Ah, man. All right, cool
Ah, shit! Screw it!
Ah. Really?
All Frank's talk about Nazi treasure Uh huh.
All over my beautiful brown body!
All right, anyway, do you think that that painting...
All right, everybody. Go, get out of here. Go and be free.
All right, guys, listen.
All right, guys. My mom has real problems. I need real help.
All right, I drew this woman in, I styled her hair, I entered her
All right, I remember exactly what happened, all right?
All right, I want to welcome all of you Atwater investors,
All right, I'm very excited about your passion for the company,
All right, sit down, sit down.
All right, so don't interrupt.
All right, that's it. It's over. You can all go. The company's gone.
All right, then screw it
All right?
All right.
All right. Here we go. Make a left right there.
All right. Shit
All you did was spend your money on stuff you don't need, just
Always check your breath. Right.
Am I right? We gotta have it in plain English.
Amazing! You guys are out of control
An original Hitler. Yes!
And a thumbtack is sharp
And at the end, whoever has the most gavels on their side wins.
And b y the way, my fa theris going public with TafiCo next' week,
And Bill Larkin.
And everybody believed him, because he was so smart.
And he wanted to turn his life around, and that's what he did, Frank.
And he was the happiest chap in all of Germany. Right
And he'll give you a mink coat.
And his expensive podiums,
And I am feeling as if he is a... neighbor or an enemy
And I believe that maybe he can
And I knew that it was gonna be fine because this guy would be
And I licked her asshole a little bit.
And I like me
And I'll give the order myself.
And I'm a professional, so I will tuck and roll.
And just kind of see how we feel about it.
And that first move... is this.
And then let's decide as a majority who's in the right.
And they're probably gonna be friends with this LeFevre guy.
And to anyone who does not have a glass of sambuca... Look around now.
And to go down on Chrissy Orlando on the trampoline later,
And we can cure cancer with plants
And we could lose everything, we could lose everything that we
And yet, when I really need to get in touch with you,
And you clipped someone's side mirror while parking in a handicap spot
And, Dee, you're gonna have to do all the Charlie work in the
And, Frank, how many unregistered guns are in your car right now?
Anyway, they got me doing this this community service thing.
Anyway, who wants to invest?
Applause for our troop here.
Are the only people empowered to decide whether or not he stays on those machines.
Are you eating the soup? Is he eating the soup?
Are you feeling it?
Are you happy now? Here's some dishes.
Are you off soon?
Are you pretending that you're 23 years old?
Are you saying that we have to decide whether that old Nazi bitch lives or dies?
Are you serious?
Are you serious? Mm hmm. Yeah.
Are you serious? Yeah.
Are you sure you want to watch him die?
Are you wearing a mink coat?
Arguments do not have winners.
Artemis, what are you doing?
As per the will, the only living blood relatives,
As the executor of your mother's estate, I'm here to inform you...
At a dead stop, and Frank rams into me out of nowhere!
At least sex it up. Open some buttons. No. I don't want to. Stop it.
Attention, uh, attention, everyone, please.
Aw, I feel like we need to pick the dog. You know what I mean?
Back at the table!
Be pretty, you know, talk to me right.
Be subtle, be small
Because evolution is bullshit. It's not real.
Because he's the only one that can handle my intensity
Because I am gonna smash your teeth into dust!
Because my mom has a doctor...
Because they believed it so
Because they knew we were sitting right underneath a vent.
Beef and beer, huh?
Before we make our decision, right? Mm hmm.
Being enemies, we start becoming friends here, huh?
Beneath your wings.
Big things, baby!
Big time. Don't be jelly. [ Popping Tongue ]
Bit, and just, you know, land on them
Bodies too
Bodyguard? [ Chuckles ]
Boil them down to little energy balls to sustain me, but whatever. Forget it.
Boom. It's the Holy Trinity beef and beer and Jesus.
Bring in... the Warthog
Burned down and we had to give them our mansion
But I can't understand this college boy's language.
But if you think you can make it stop, I need your help
But it is clearly about much more than just the dishes.
But it was fine.
But it wasn't just our idea to break up the wedding.
But it's the truth. So congratulations to your family
But let's just run out of here.
But then his beloved pet was ripped from him,
But then what happened to it from there, I don't know.
But then, when you started talking about God,
But we do.
But we know the truth.
By playing up your m0m's cancer and “Oh, she's dying” And she is, you know
Bye. Goddamn.
Can I talk to you for a second? Why are you here, honestly?
Can you conjure the dead?
Can you get my dead whore wife back here so I can lay into her from the other side?
Charlie, having somebody making wild decisions...
Charlie, I just got a new nose and I'm flying to Miami to get my lips inflated.
Charlie, I want a list of the top 1 O shareholders of the company, A.S.A.P.
Charlie, phone call for you
Charlie, we got to talk.
Charlie, what is so hard to understand?
Charlie, you got me 31 new followers?
Charlie! Listen to me.
Charlie's been with me the entire day
Cheers. [Chattering ]
Cleaning up the poops, you know,
Come on, buddy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Come on, Charlie, please.
Come on, do it, do the shots.
Come on, guy. No. No
Come on, silly head.
Come on. [ Dogs Barking ]
Come on. My support system. Oh, right, right, right.
Cool. Cool. Thank you. Thank you
Correct. You consumed his corpse and you drank his blood. Okay. Okay.
Could've been the Nazi treasure that Frank's looking for?
Cricket could be a threat. No, I have cleared him on multiple occasions.
D0n”t do it, bitch!
Deandra. Yeah?
Dee, uh, please prepare me a bowl of cereal. Yep.
Dee! Dee! Don't go down there
Dennis has been going around pretending to be him...
Dennis was trying to get the signature from Maureen,
Dennis, as I think you know, I'm not at liberty to discuss another patient
Dennis, if I had a gun with me, I'd be spraying bullets into the air as I fell.
Dennis, it's not like your chair's gonna catch on fire.
Dennis, you don't want to go anywhere near a court.
Dennis? Dennis!
Derived from the mother earth.
Did Charlie steal my bike? What are you talking about?
Did I Did I just do your job for you?
Did I just do your job for you?
Did this.
Did we wear those uniforms? I don't remember those. Do you?
Do me a favor, refill my bowl of energy balls, okay?
Do me a favor. I'm really stuck in this window.
Do not go to them
Do you feel it? Do you feel the spirit?
Do you feel the invisible things around you that don't really exist?
Do you have anything from the mother earth...
Do you hear me?
Do you know he has a bunch of followers?
Do you know that he's parading around in a mink coat, and he humiliated me?
Do you know where that might be? The dog pa/ht/hg? Oh!
Do you understand genetic mutations at all?
Do you want to follow her around some more? Nah, whatever. She's, like
Do you... do you have a brain in your head?
Doctor client privilege. Don't worry about it. I got what you need.
Don't dick around with this.
Don't get all riled up about this scam or that scam, you know.
Don't start doing that, because you're gonna
Don't start with me.
Dr. Jinx got something for feeling.
Dr. Jinx is a con artist and a lunatic.
Dude, are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Dude, I'm thinking that maybe that painting could be
Dude, stop it!
Dude, the church doesn't give money
Eating a bowl of cereal while operating a car is
Eh, they didn't make me a janitor; there was a..
Enter a new dimension.
Excuse me?
Excuse me. Excuse me.
Excuse me. ls one of you Brian LeFevre?
Execution leaves a lot to be desired.
Experience a new reality.
Fine, take the goddamn chair
First off, uh, who is the defendant in this matter?
For me?
Frank told you about that?
Frank, it's the only way to settle the argument and find out who is the winner.
Frank, you are SweetPeaches69?
Frank! [ Frank ] VVhere are you?
Frank! [ Laughing ] Frank.
Gaming I've been playing this online video game.
Get a little tipsy. Things take a violent turn.
Get me a pile of matches to sit on that'll be fine.
Get my energy balls.
Get out of here!
Get the hell out of the way. Get out of the way.
Give me that. Brothers, I don't know about you,
Glance around the room?
Go on! Pack your shit up and get out of here.
Go. Go.
God! I'm gonna have to change my number agai
Goddamn it.
Goddamn you, okay? I could've gotten some cash out of these men.
Goes around solving crimes and mysteries. Yes.
Good. Right.
Got it, got it. Kick me around.
Got to get back online ASAP.
Great job, Frank. Sorry, sorry, sorry. I'm running a little bit late.
Great. I got just the one.