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Home > The Office - Season 3
Warning: This soundboard may contain objectionable content, and is Not Safe For Work (NSFW)
A piece of paper of some sort. Receipt. I don't know.
About 40 times a year,
Above the sink.
Actually looks bigger with people in it. It's weird. So..
Actually, Michael, I think we're going to take it in another direction
All right
All right, everybody in the conference room!
All right, okay
All right. Find a cozy spot. Everybody, settle in
All right. Yay, yay, yay, yay. That's just the way we talk in the clink
ALL: Ready! Three! Two! One!
ALL: Yeah! Yeah?
Am I on speakerphone?
And besides, I have already given a copy to David.
And breaking corporate news
And do you, Bob, take Phyllis to be your lawfully wedded wife?
And especially not to me
And I am back.
And I had fun goofing around with Dwight today.
And I miss you.
And I take that as a compliment
And I will...
And if I fall back into the same kind of things I used to do,
And it is criminal
And my question to you is, do you agree?
And now the chains
And now, Michael the Magic will attempt to escape from extreme bondage
And now, without further ado,
And that way we don't have to speak to each other
And that's all I'm gonna say about it,
And we have parties here.
And we kissed
AND Y: Am I trying to get under his skin? Yes.
And you know science.
And you still managed to trim the budget. That is nice work
And you wanna move to Scranton.
And, I know everybody says this, but I want to remain friends.
And, you know how all waitresses look alike.
ANDY: Hello.
ANDY: Hey, Cindy,
Anti flashing task force!
Any man who says he totally understands women is a fool.
Anybody need sun block? I've got SPF 30.
Apology not accepted.
Are we gonna... They are such babies
Are you free for dinner tonight?
Are you gonna try it?
Are you sure I can't use, like,
As ranking number two,
As we walk in fields of gold
At my job or with "the lady folk,"
At the Stamford branch, they all play this World War II videogame called Call of Duty
Attention, everyone. Attention, please
Awesome. I'm gonna frame mine
Baby. Hello, baby.
Because he accomplished something.
Because he likes them, okay?
Because I know you're probably worried about pleasing Bob
Because it contains all other colors. Wrong. Black. It is the most dominant
Because it wasn't even necessary in the first place
Because it's a felony
Because she said "awesome" 1 2 times
Because that would have been the ass kicking of the year
Because you did something so nice for me earlier.
Both animals were smiling. Okay
But back in high school, I swear her nickname was Easy Rider.
But can you sing in a sexy, high falsetto voice?
But it feels so good
But maybe one day. I hope so
But once I did it, I didn't look back
But that was before. I'm thinking about getting something German,
But, you know, I really only slept there, you know?
By now, you're probably sick of hearing about Dunder Mifflin
Call my man Dwight Just to see what was shakin'!
Calling me a Nerf.
Can I get you a beverage? Yeah, I'd like a..
Can I have a late checkout? I'll have to talk to the manager.
Check in time is now. Checkout time is never.
Check this out, it's so hateful.
Chicken or fish?
Come on
Come on, let's get back to the party. Come on
Come on! Hurry up, you guys!
Come on. Come on.
Come on. I can't let you in, Michael
Conference room, 10 seconds
Corporate maligning, slurring, much of it coming from one of you,
Creed is eating an apple.
Cri man squa, F and C, double time.
Damn it!
Darryl, I did not walk out in the middle of yours, so...
Designed to increase your knowledge on the world of paper
Did you already forward it to a whole bunch of people?
Do you expect me to believe
Do you have the tools to turn a wooden mop handle into a stake?
Do you really expect me to not push you up against the wall, biatch?
Does Bob Vance work for Vance Refrigeration?
Does it usually fall in a liquid, solid, or gaseous state?
Don't put my jacket on... Don't give me that
Dunder Mifflin can't compete with the modern chains,
Dunder Mifflin, this is Grace. Sure
Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam
Dwight is our new boss. No, Michael's not going anywhere
Dwight says that he actually doesn't know
Dwight, where are the warehouse guys?
Dwight, you cannot keep that here.
Ever since March Madness ended, I am so bored.
Everything is going to be totally... Pam.
Excuse me
Excuse me? Or the front of the bus or drive the bus.
Excuse me.
Fine! Sit back and do nothing and let us all get fired
For a year!
For not saving the excess oil from a can of tuna.
From the future.
Further regarding your paycheck!
Gays aren't necessarily who you think they are..
Good night, Pam.
Good to see you. Have a seat
Good. Good.
Good. I'm glad
Gryffindor! CREED: Gryffindor!
Hail to the chief
Hand me that water. I always say, "Beer me
Have a seat
Have Padge do it or the sea monster.
He doesn't know anything and neither do you.
He has got this very likeable way about him.
He says he needs a woman's touch
He told me how he felt and I guess I had feelings, too.
He would not have wanted me to have seen Jim's..
He's a cartoonist for the local paper,
He's always looking at the camera, like this
He's back!
Hello. I don't believe we've been introduced
Here's my card.
Hey, buddy.
Hey, do you mind if I take the lead on this one?
Hey, dude. I just got back from Jamaica
Hey, Hunter
Hey, Kenny. Sorry about the jet skis
Hey. Hey.
Hey. I think it looks great. Thanks, Pam.
How are you, man? Good to see you. I'm good. How are you?
How difficult would that have been?
How is it going to be okay, Dwight?
How to knit. Welcome, welcome, welcome!
I am a great interviewee
I am going nowhere.
I am off to a very good start, wouldn't you say?
I am starting a committee to determine
I am. You should come dance with us.
I bet a lot of straight men wished that applied to them
I bought a ticket for Grizzly Man
I can't believe I'm actually doing this
I can't explain it.
I can't hear what he's saying, but he looks like he's really into it
I can't talk here. It's too sensitive
I could beat that on a skateboard. Well, that has wheels.
I cry myself to sleep. Jim
I didn't... I didn't do anything
I don't accept your apology
I don't care if that's how they consolidated power in ancient Rome, I'm...
I don't know how the whole betting thing started,
I don't know. It could be good
I don't know. It was here when I was born
I don't know. Just not yet.
I don't know. Something like that
I don't need your help. Thank you, no
I don't think laughing about it is an appropriate response
I don't think we need to do this..
I feel like things were a little weird today, or something.
I find it offensive. Au naturel, baby
I forgot that my primary goal is to keep people safe
I found a potato.
I got down there, I nailed the interview and the strangest thing happened.
I got it, I got it, Dwight! Just...
I got some good experience,
I got to win her back
I had to make Andy my number two. It's political, complicated
I have no gift to bring Pa rum pum pum pum
I invited all of you. That really sucked.
I just ate there last night.
I just wanted to say thanks, good luck.
I knew he'd turn up. You see that?
I know you probably aren't gonna remember this, but,
I know. Okay, we will be Voldemort.
I look like an idiot!
I love it!
I may have seen it somewhere.
I may have underestimated you.
I mean, it's not like she's ever done anything to me.
I mean, there's my window.
I miss the days when there was only one party I didn't want to go to.
I nearly vomited
I need to see which one of these people have the skills to be a chicken head.
I need you to do something for me. Yes, anything.
I really couldn't be happier.
I specifically went on vacation so I would miss it.
I tell you one thing, Dunder Mifflin is here to stay!
I think I'll go to Angela's party,
I think that's really...
I think you're a really sweet guy.
I thought so, too
I told her I didn't know whether you'd want to do it
I want the branch
I was at a parent teacher conference
I was walking to the building and this man asked me for directions
I will see you
I will wake up stronger than ever because I will have used that time
I wish someone had flashed me when I was with Roy
I worked in a warehouse. Men's Wearhouse.
I would be the secret assistant regional manager
I would probably get some negative feedback on my eBay profile, but...
I... In the last year,
I'll be the number two guy here in Scranton in six weeks.
I'll be with you in a moment. All right
I'll just have some bread
I'll try Brookstone
I'm acting inappropriate? Yeah
I'm back
I'm going to put my money where my mouth is
I'm just calling to say that I think we need a little break.
I'm just in this, like, stupid fight with Karen.